The trees conspire in company
to cut the power to our house
for there is something in the woods
that hates electric wire
and trees have reason, certainly
to fear the reach of our desire.
Born in shivers in the caves
where primitives had wit to spark
compliant tinder into flame
and feed the trees into the fire.
The firs that circle round our place
seem confounded by the glare.
Our floodlights float a misty scrim
that dulls the ancient sky,
and when the power died tonight
I thought I heard a sigh.
Author notes
Oct 12, 2008
A contest entry
- great pieces that never got enough recognition by unraveled.
700 points, ended November 9, 2008, 35 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pre-writes and Fresh Writes Contest by FloridaGatorQueen.
525 points, ended November 15, 2008, 66 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - First Poem I Ever Wrote on AP by PerVirtuous.
900 points, ended August 23, 45 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Very interesting. Trees are very strange creatures. They think. Straight to the finalist list where it belongs.
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'and trees have reason, certainly
to fear the reach of our desire'
great lines, echoed in the final two.
Another poem of wonderful imagery, that stretches the reader into a different, co-existing world where all life is connected. I liked the trip from Plato's cave to the floodlights - I hear that sigh too.
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What a wonderful poetic expression of nature. I saw its vulnerability to when thrown into flames. This has a curious sense of mystery which is very enticing. Great imagery through eloquent language. A pleasure to read...alby
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In the beginning I was with you all the way... trees conspiring to cut the electric lines which they frequently succeed in doing given their close proximity to power lines and their relative inability to stand up to stong winds as they grow old.
The second part I see in complete reverse. When my power goes out, I might be tempted to go out with my saw and cut me some firewood for heat and light. To my senses, the trees should sigh a sigh of relief when the lights come back on, because now I can put my trusty McCullough away.
Technically, I love the enjambments of the second verse but the successive capital letters after the first line are confusing.
Perhaps poems where each line is an independent thought or idea are more suited to the old fashioned CAPS at the beginning of every line and commas or periods at the end.
Well, enough of that for now.
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wow this is a little creepy! LoL
what would it be like if this were true? well its beautifully written and it is such a lovely piece.
thank you so much for sharing.
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This is an interesting poem. I agree that trees are bad for power lines. I enjoyed the read!!! Thank you for entering my contest
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I liked this.... the rhyme is good, the meter is also well done, the story is described quite nicely. I liked that ending, and the line "Our floodlights float a misty scrim that dulls the ancient sky" -- what a neat image!
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Thank you so much.
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