I Was Not There To Witness
All the tears stolen from innocent swollen eyes
Children bathed in their own blood; scars up to their fragile thighs
Victims’ terrified hiding under their families corpses of mud
Slaughtered and butchered as the crimes increase and flood.
A Little Girl
Clinging to the only thing dear to her
Her moms corpse lying in her bare naked hands
Tears aren’t enough to cleanse her wounds
Where is everyone when humanity fails to stand?
A Father
Who labors in a grave
Who knows no peace
Who fights for a crust of bread
To feed starving mouths, each get barely a piece.
Inhumanity Is Forsaken
Sexual violence against women and girls
Mutilation practiced on body parts
As predators feed on their fragile flesh
When it all seem to end; it only begins and starts
An Act Of Genocide
We’ll keep the blood alive of all the distant mountains drained in damp grave yards
We’ll dig out the endless trenches draped with bones stacked twisted & countless.
All the shoveled lives eternally lost in ashen pits will resurrect
Of women, men and children; faceless, ageless forever voiceless.
...They will no longer be buried nor decked.
Author notes
This poem is an inspiration from a couple of movies I saw related to the Rwandan and Armenian genocide.
Of course there's alot more Genocide's marked in history that we should recognize and share to keep the souls of all the victims’ long gone alive and to remind ourselves that humanity still exists.
I feel that my poem might be incomplete and lack in structure.. Any suggestions or help would be appreciated to make it better.
The last stanza of my poem is an aspiration from a peom, it captivated me and the words just got stuck to my head.
Thankyou Jthserra, you are a very talented poet.
Constructive Criticism needed! Any Thoughts?
Comments
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The depth
of your thought reveals the stark bone hard reality of the evil that haunts the hearts of men, capturing their victims blood in pools of thought in which to drown their tormentors.
A thought provoking and string write!
May your day be one of hope and peace
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A vivid picture of the grotesque nature of man over even the most petty of things. Opportunism at its absolute worst, and for what?
Critically speaking, "decked?" -
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okay, is it better now ?!
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The word "decked" just doesn't seem to work. I'd suggest a different word like "shelved" or something but it doesn't rhyme, if you're still following the old convention.
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am trying to hard to fit it in, dammit !
your right =( lol -
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... They will no longer be buried; impossible to neglect.
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love it!!!, just dont think "impossible" fits, seems out of place, try to think of a word to replace it.
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They will no longer be buried; their lives harder to neglect.
I guess. -
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why did we think..
they will no longer be buried nor neglect.
or does it have to be "neglected" .shit. i never got stuck on a word before.. its been taunting me for ages now. -
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Grammatically it would have to be "neglected" if worded that way. The way you have this last line cordonned off allows you to expand its length a good deal without breaking the flow of the poem, I think. But maybe I'm not understanding what the last line is really trying to convey.
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Thanx for you input.. and your right
- it really is out of place, trying to think of an alternative. I might even take that word out and see how it goes...
thanx again
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Yeah, I've actually tried to rewrite the entire last stanza several times to no avail.
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Lol, it’s alright. I tried too before I even post it.
It’s very tricky, the whole structure of my poem rhymes, with my last stanza, couldn’t find anything that rhymes with resurrect, tried changing the wording and still, got stuck every time.
I removed "decked" until I think of something.
Thank you for giving the time to help, appreciate it!
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This prompts an awesome awakening to the world. I like the unique 'order' of familial reflections. Its content will warrant any family member, reminding them of how consequential the genicide is to each.
Sobering. I will have to come back as it is like reading war poetry. Perhaps we can invoke a fellow poet's ideas on how it is lined up. He would be more qualified.
Brilliant reduction to humanity. Thank you!
as from me...
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