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God Knows...

Day moons do not glow
They idle
Artificial spheres that have no purpose
Only watching daytime at work

Red pens with green ink are indifferent
Inconsequential
They latter excessive cigarette filters
That ride the U-bend circuit

Bob Dylan delivers himself in the past
And I know,
The future will be no different
At least I can laugh sincerely

Cynically...

Author notes

This was one of those poems you write in 5 minutes...

I was secretly smoking a cigarette in the bathroom, and when I opened the window, the only thing I could see was the moon... In the middle of the day... Bob Dylan was playing in the background, as I wrote this, and as I noticed how long cigarette filters actually are... A scam if you ask me... I was writing with a red pen strangely, and I had just gotten a green pen for school...

Its random and I know it!

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • movedon
    October 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow

    random...0.0 i like random (hence my name)

    but this is really good. i loved the AN. what an awesome inspiration. lol. anyway, shaawesome poem. i loved it

    ing just for you,
    Mylee


  • UnderThePickleTree
    October 15, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Sweet

    Definetly an enjoyable peice :-)

    I dig it.


  • TabbyCat
    October 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I likey...So many little details here that were unexpected and original. Plus, the author's notes were fun...I re-read it afterwards and was much more satisfied. I like the ending. Left me thinking....made an impression.


  • SomeGirlYouKnew
    October 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    the first two lines were my favourites.
    and the last two.
    i want to steal them and make them into their own poem without anything else in the middle.
    but not really.
    but. i enjoyed reading this.
    awesome job. yayferrandomness!


  • turtletacular
    October 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is very random, bu not in a bad way. It seems to be exactly what you wrote it as (I know that doesn't really make sense)...a reflection of life in one moment. Very good, luvd it!


  • stylization
    October 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I enjoy this quite a lot. It's fantastic. It reminds me of a lot of published pieces I've read. Amazing write.


  • sora.
    October 11, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    sheesh!

    all i have to say to you, mr claasen, is that...
    if you can write material like this in 5 minutes, there is really no hope for the rest of us, is there?
    =D

    the last stanza is my favourite, though i would like you to give me a more detailed synopsis of it, please.
    =]

    i dub this:
    bathroom philosophical-ness.
    yes, im sure that is a word...


    sweet.


    • Ditt0
      October 12, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanx man... Do you mean a synopsis in my explanation? or in the actual poem... Thank you very much...

      • sora.
        October 12, 2008
        Edit | Reply
        hahaha in the explanation would be fine...
        i think it would be a little retarded to have a synopsis in the poem itself..
        o_0
        =D

1 - 9 of 9