In silent yearn she watched them all,
as they in quickened step passed by.
She called for human touch and sigh,
from window in the clothing store.
As they in quickened step passed by,
her time had come for her to leave.
Of this she also was aggrieved,
they did not hear her anguished cry.
She called for human touch and sigh,
just once that they’ll take note of her.
Within her heart was painful stir,
she had now seen the ‘For Sale’ sign.
From window in the clothing store,
was heard a boy’s excited cry:
“Look daddy, like mom in the sky”
her desire not needed anymore.
Author notes
A Retourne.
Picture: http://www.mattonimages.co.uk/search.php?sim=GLO_GWT197006.JPG&sok=mannequin
In a list
A contest entry
- desires... by PrabhuDayal Khattar.
300 points, ended October 24, 2008, 8 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Wondrous Gold!
Well done, Frans. You deserved this "through and through".
Love
Myra -
PrabhuDayal
I hope that by 'copy and paste', I am getting your name corrrect? I thank you for the gold. This is a surprise. However, as always I enjoyed the challenge you set. Frans
Ps
Something went wrong, the copy and paste did not work! -
i am not enamored of the form, the retourne, but this helps give us all an idea of how expressive the form can be...here a touch of saudade and the depth of feeling is wonderful in the emphasis of the form...excellent..gold seems to be the right adornment here...PK
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Ah, what a line to satisfy
the mannequin's desire!
Frans, you read her "mind"
so well, imagined her plight!
Aesthete
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Beautiful Thoughts
Yes Frans, we all need the human touch of love and kindness in our lives. They say it is the most important for newborns to feel that human touch.
What a beautiful poem. So sad though that many lack such an available thing. I guess we should love thy neighbors more. Hugs to you acros the ocean blue Bless you my friend.
Peace and Grace,
Sandy
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You relativated the loneliness ...
as we continue through our days, not noticing something until it is presented to us as a "bargain" -- a gain. How many souls suffer such deprivation ... And interesting here IS: that the child, in innocence, became metaphor for the manifestation of yearning and gave voice and flesh and bone so to speak to the desire, to be appreciated, seen, valued ... spiritually ... Even for one eternal second of being substitute ...
I can write an entire thesis on this poem. You are remarkable.
Love
Myra
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Ah..I love the approach which is reflecting in the deep of inside of the words bringing an intriguing journey of the life showing the feelings lost somewhere and left inside us as our incomplete desires..a great job indeed...
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hmmm... to be honest, i don't think i understand it, but good nonetheless! i don't need to understand to enjoy, right?
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A touch of sadness.
I like the journey in the mind of the dummy with feelings. It puts emotion in your poem. My mind feels the sadness as she 'calls for human touch and sigh.'
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Well I am no expert at retourne's but you always make me smile with your poetry.
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