if you want to see
what goes on in my head,
to study the texture
of bullets
inches away from blue-flame;
if you want to tame
the crows that shit
on the boulevard of my heart-
there is no bitterness.
you can’t just
look out the window
and heal me with beauty.
love is drunk,
you must understand.
that love is a slut
in the middle of sahara.
that if my bones go crazy
searching the aurora borealis
of your breath,
it’s only normalcy disease
and i don’t want the miracle-syrup
which can cure my throat
from the hoarse
taste of your kiss.
if you want to study
the texture of bullets
and how to suck it away
from my head-
please
wear my name on a flag pole
& i promise
you will be safe in
these corneas that have developed
an instinct of you.
please.
because i had sworn to a god
i didn’t believe in
to tell the truth
but not the whole truth.
i have taught patience to my tongue.
but you mean more than the sea
splashing in tidal waves
across the cardinal points
of galaxy.
you mean more than what’s earthed
inside me
and perhaps if we were each other’s
broken-stringed guitar,
we could make the staff line of life
less linear and more
melodic
’cause the audience doesn’t feel mercy
enough to encore.
Author notes
Oct. 10, 2008
A contest entry
- you're the gravity that's holding me down by seraphim shock.
11500 points, ended October 23, 2008, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - hidden agenda by Randomly Beautiful.
300 points, ended October 18, 2008, 9 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Honesty.
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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i listened to it and all i have to say is WOW
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oh im going to try to listen to it now.
this was fantastically brilliant!

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Thank you
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"you must understand
that love is a slut
in the middle of the sahara"
that was amazing. -
You are always fresh and original.


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"there is no bitterness.
you can’t just
look out the window
and heal me with beauty.
love is drunk,
you must understand.
that love is a slut
in the middle of sahara.
that if my bones go crazy
searching the aurora borealis
of your breath,"
that part is outstanding.
this line I thought could be changed
"it’s only normalcy disease"
maybe to just "it’s only normal"
because then it's more confusing/thought-provoking
[since the previous lines hint at disease, but normal negates that]
that's my "critique"
but I love this, though I don't claim to fully understand.
ps- I would've liked to listen as well, but my computer won't play it.

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Thanks!

If you want and can give me an email address, I could send you the audio file when I get back on my home computer (around the weekend)
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1 - 8 of 8




