Mister Sandman was here
Like he is every night
Filled my mind with fear
Mister Sandman was here
Now my outlook is queer
Last night was no delight
Mister Sandman was here
Like he ir every night.
In a list
A contest entry
- Enter Sandman - a suzi & jan contest by jantastic.
3500 points, ended November 7, 2008, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
I see Suzi already pointed out the typo. It's been quite some time since I've written any form poetry. You managed to encompass a fair bit in a short form. Dreams often do leave us with queer outlooks.
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ir in the last line should be 'is'
and it seems as if towards the end you contradict yourself..as if he goes from scary to delightful somehow.
An interesting entry, though
Thanks for taking the time.
Good luck.
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