Sunrise paints a breaking day, welcome to new dawn,
Open wide your eyes, to this beauty, soft, new born.
Lullabies of morning dew, glisten on the ground,
As spiders count the droplets, on cobwebs they have found.
Remember well the feeling, each nascent day can bring,
In seasons born of nature, Summer, Autumn, Spring.
Sip slowly from the chalice, created long ago,
Enjoy the blesséd sunlight, drink in its warming glow
Author notes
Word Prompt - Solarise.
Expose to sunlight.
A contest entry
- Word of the Day IV by Gaffer.
450 points, ended November 5, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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Sorry it has taken me so long to post a comment.
It is a cute poem. Acrostic can be hard to do and can really limit how a poem flows. With such a constraint already present, I'm not sure rhyming was really necessary. Overall, very pretty imagery in this poem. It reminds me a little of a children's lullaby or mother goose rhyme...
I think the metaphors in this poem can be improved, and that great metaphor could add a lot to this poem and really make it beautiful. Some of the current metaphors didn't make sense to me (ex: lullabies of morning dew).
The line about seasons born of nature was really cute. I enjoyed the metaphor about drinking in the sunlight... the lines "sip slowly from the chalice" and "drink in its warming glow". Perhaps the imagery and metaphor of drinking from the chalice can be sustained through other parts of the poem as well? I think that was the strongest metaphor in the poem, and if you run with that theme, you could have a beautiful image.
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A very enjoyable write. I like the prompt you were given and you used it well. The acrostic wasn't forced at all.
Solarise.



