Toiling away the hours,
quoting all the books she’s read
As the bowels of mighty Satan,
drip their bile upon her bed
Not just another school girl,
trying to make tomorrows grade
Though in her life there’s purpose,
killing those who have betrayed
Luring Satan in with promises,
of her treats; he would enjoy
Then gutting him so effortlessly,
her girlish charm was a decoy
To wreak havoc on the people,
who have treated her so bad
Next target are the assholes,
dearest drunken mom and dad
Revenging, for her torture,
all the nights dad gave her baths
And the times when “mommy dearest”,
flayed legs for failing math
They have raised the devils daughter,
and she has taken full control
Devastating all the people,
laying waste to each one's soul
She started working off a list,
of all those ones who let her down
Massacred them in the hundreds,
in that small New England town
They call her the devils mistress,
ruling with the strength of hand
With her army of evil minions,
she stretches out across the land
When you hear the mournful calling,
and the drums beat death to all
There’ll be no place you can hide,
there will be no one left to call
Her carnage they’ll tell in legends,
as she carves the hope from their chests
Leaving millions of rotting corpses,
filled with hate; totally obsessed
Delivering agony and murder,
there' s only one place you can stand
In the service of his daughter,
as her wish is your command
Author notes
artwork:Untitled___commission_by_ani_r_atdeviantart.com (I tried to change my style but it did not have the same punch) poem #1 (butter pecan)
A contest entry
- Darkened Decadance -- Round 2 by x--nocturnia--x.
1000 points, ended November 17, 2008, 6 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - the DARKWRITE challenge rides again by Ktulu Blackwolfe.
600 points, ended December 20, 2008, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Misfits Enter Here ~ If You Dare by nichtmich.
1750 points, ended December 19, 2008, 30 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - anything and everything, just entertain me by Luciferschild.
800 points, ended January 27, 124 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dark writes contest!!!! Check it out by AngelsKissesJenna.
450 points, ended May 17, 71 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - It’s a CREEPY Dark Rounds Contest by Paloszoo by Paloszoo.
1200 points, ended July 11, 42 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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wow, creepy lady you portretted there, brilliant write and deserved cup winner, well done!
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I don`t know what to say...this is dark and i love it! I liked this so much. I wish the best of luck to you in your contests
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eeeeeeew. I love this! Excellent all around! Thanks for entering my contest and showing your work here. It's an honor to read it
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Loved this one. It was great.........Wait it was a brilliant write.
Imagery/10
Style/30
background/30
Prompt used/40
Prewrite/10
fresh write/0
Points: 120
Fave part: Luring Satan in with promises,
of her treats; he would enjoy
Then gutting him so effortlessly,
her girlish charm was a decoy
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sounds alot like something i would write, this poem literally restored my faith in this site, all night i have been reading crappy poems until i stumbled across this one, i would not change one word, i think it is perfect. thank you for entering i will definitely take another look at this one
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Eloquent poem by a true misfit, a child who has carefully been taught that love is deceit and lies. Thank you for your entry!
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Nicely done, you words weave a wicked tale indeed. The imagery and emotion portrayed here is dark and eerie. A sweet read. Thank you for entering and good luck
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This is quite the read. I loved the imagery and use of word play here. Great job
**Ktulu Blackwolfe** -
wow wow wow!!!!
Totally impressed i have to say that i was incrediously awesome!!!!!
spine tingling, deeply written full of meaning heartache and pain all in one! a fantastically great write!! Keep it up
Tara
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Definitely a piece that delivered and did not disappoint. I enjoyed a lot parts of this poem, particularly the flayed legs image...I could relate well, and it sent delicious shivers down my spine.
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lovely, lovely dark layers and textures to this poem.
You and I ...would be a great dark story-telling team!
ya think it's the dab of irish in us....for legendary
fables we irish have employed! (or do you deny it's
presence)
I loved it!
ah...your ink is a pleasure to read!
loved it!
ears/Seattle
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I would love to write as a team sometime you let me know when and I am in. We'll scare everyone. Hell they'll make it a movie! Thanks again I really owe ya, Boog
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wow,, i really am speachless,, this poem is really gripping, i loved it
love always
erica carnea
p.s great write
xxx
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Nice job. It was a very gripping and horrible tale. I don't see too many poems taking this approach. You did find, and I would not change your style. It is fine.
Mike
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can i hand her my list? i think she would do a better job than me
good luck in the contest
excellent job me thinks!
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Brilliantly penned Boog! Good luck to you in the contest
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This called for dark and dark it is! This was written so well
They have raised the devils daughter,
and she has taken all control
She will devastate the people,
laying waste to all their souls
She started working off a list,
of all those ones who let her down
Massacred them in the hundreds,
in that small New England town
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