An open confession
of who I used to be.
How I would deny myself
the privilege to be me.
I would always make myself
a shadow gone unknown.
I would always tell myself
that I am here alone.
Becoming victim to my past
my thoughts would start to drift.
Conveniently forgetting,
my power and my gift.
It is not reward
that I would bear for you or flaunt.
This gift I have, it gives to me
exactly what I want.
I have the type of talent
that makes people envy me.
Many traits within myself
shall remain a mystery.
I've always had this talent
and I never chose to utilize.
The brilliance that runs through my vains
the future in my eyes.
To understand the motive
as to why things go my way.
And how they've all conditioned me
to lead myself astray.
It brings a sense of startled shock
how could I've been so wrong.
I am something great
I guess I knew that all along.
My "gods" they tried to show me
that I'd live my life with enormous success.
Yet feeling undeserving
I confined myself to my self imposed mess.
Knocking down the walls
that force me to live in this hell.
Somehow I've managed to get up
from trials each time I fell.
So now I realize
that I can do this once again.
Learning from the trials
that I encounter now and then.
Author notes
Well, I guess I must confess, perhaps I overdramatize my past. For many years, I've had this "hidden" potential. For some odd reason, I didn't want to believe it, nor did I think that I'd deserve it.
I have it now, and I feel a sort of inner serenity that I've never felt before. Now acknowledging myself, it will be extremely easy to acknowledge others. I hope you like this, because I my opinion, it's the best one I've written. This is because it's more from the heart, than anything I'd sculpted prior to this Moment Of Awakening.
Share with me your interpretations.
Comments
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Excellent read!!
I really love your work. this piece is a journey...overcoming the many things that try to keep us in the dark from our own potential...really great piece of art and passion...thanks so much for sharing!
Windsong
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How I would deny myself
the privilege to be me
Got me thinking... something that we all do to ourselves. Once you dare stand up for who you are, and for your own talents, shorcommings etc, you will get far. Sound strong poem.
Great write..
Lilian
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I really like this poem.
However, I don't agree with your statement in the comments about how life has no meaning.
Think about this: If there is no meaning to life, then we wouldn't know what 'meaningless' meant. There would be no such thing. If we lived in a world with no lights "darkness" would mean nothing to us.
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AFFIRMATIVE
as there is no scarcity of love, when one relationship ends. mourn it as is its due to the real emotions contained with in, then move on, like i said, there is no scarcity, there are mostly only people who are timid to be hurt who settle, and ironically, get hurt
PEACE -
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Let me share with you a small peace of my recent life story. So many people are surprised that I'd merely forgiven my last relational partner for all that had occured. To quote some "I would hate, never forgive, and probably seek vengeance upon anyone like what you'd explained to me."
Whether you love or hate someone, the blunt truth is that your energies are still focused on their existence. Besides, if one seeks vengeance, what's the point? They still get the best of you. If one could find that median point of neutrality, then they would be able to learn the lessons needing to be learned from their prior encounter. They would be able to take the facts, and let the bonds that they were once attached to that now remain undeserving of such compassion "at least from me at this current moment." Got off track, anyway, they'd be able to let their bonds go.
I make it look easy, but it's not as soft as it may seem. I still wake up some days, struggling to come to terms with what has just happened. However, things rappen, learn and take away what you can, and just move on.
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WELCOME HOME1
accepting one's self is the greatest gift of all, congratulations, brilliant poem!
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I guess you could consider me very astute and precocious for a 19 year old man. I've been through quite a bit in life, and I've learned quite a bst.
I've spent long enough in a land of low self esteem, I realized like some do, that acceptance is the key to life.
It's unfortunate, that more people my age aren't more like myself. In a weird sort of irony, I'm on the other extreme. I used to try to live up to society and culture's expectations, now I live up to my own. I will continue to do so, even if I end up alone.
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Indeed you do have much talent; I only read more than one poem of an author if i like his style, or think he has something good going on; and this must be my fifth or sixth of yours
bravo ... keep the talent flowing... 
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Thank you, I appreciate your feedback and thoughts on my work. You come to appreciate how great life is, when you spend so long denying yourself the right of it.
I've had a low self esteem for years but I finally overcame the problem. I wasn't sure of my purpose, or if I had one, and if I'd be accomplished.
Truth is, I don't have a purpose, life is meaningless... Ok, before you counteract my statement, think about it.
I'm happy knowing that I am as free as I choose to be. The only thing that gives life it's meaning is ourselves. We try to spin ourselves in to some sort of united human web of culture that doesn't exist. I guess you could say, most people hate being free.
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Very well done!
You do have alot of talent. Your an amazing write. I can relate to alot of stuff you have written. I wish I had talent like yours. You never cease to amaze me.
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I'm a great writer, well, so I've heard. I think you're a pretty decent writer yourself.
Yeah, I was forced to let certain situations go, I'm sure you could infer one of them. Anyway, I don't regret the fall outs that I've had, few ties have been fixed, and a few remain severed. I'm honestly indiferent towards the whole thing. I'm greatful to my friends, and as for those that aren't, sorry for their loss, I don't hate those people as I'm sure they hate me. My life is one that now has to practice the virtues of forgiveness, leting go, and inner serenity. Unfortunately for me, a kick to the face is my greatest teacher, as harsh as it may seem.
This statement has always had it's positive and negative connotations but I still believe it. A phrase I coined a while back, and it simply goes, "fate, it's a weird thing."
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Your right Shadow i do really like this. You always have a way with words. When reading your writing i always read it like its telling my story cause its so close to how i feel. I love it. =]
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a beautiful thought..and being as young as you are..you have a head start ....well..some people never have that awakening..good for you..great poem!
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Moment of Awakening...hm..the Awakening....Something that needs to happen to alot more people...to find their true selves and stop denying what they have and hiding it. But i do it to, so what can I say,lol. I like this poem its very beautiful and lustful. Its a inner part of you that you finally accepted, i believe if what im saying is right. Nice work. I hope you write more like this.
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Well Done
I am loving this awakening of yours. You poetry and your strength of character that is shining through.
keep it up and remember. NEVER GIVE UP. Those are magic words. Believe them and live by them.
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So I know that before I have said, one of your other poems was my favorite, but I believe this takes rank. You did so well with this, that I really have nothing negative to say at all. As usual you have graced us with the pleasure of reading your work, and I've never been happier to read something like this from you.
Well Done!
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