Snow swirls around me
As I walk through the door
Of an ancient ice castle,
Filled with magic and lore.
I close the door behind me,
Against the blur of wind and snow.
I will not be leaving the way I've arrived,
Deep inside I know.
Now I turn my attention to the castle,
Of which I've sealed myself inside.
I step on the slippery ice floor,
And through frozen corridors I glide.
Every room is layered with frost,
And lined with crystal glass.
Everywhere I look I see
Signs that say 'don't trespass.'
I shiver with realization,
And squint at the castle's glare.
This castle doesn't belong to me,
So if I die here will it care?
I know with a start
That I must be gone.
The owner of the castle will soon return,
And I struggle to keep calm.
I cannot move,
For i'm frozen in place!
In panic my arms and legs
Flail listlessly in space.
I bite back a scream,
And fight back the fear.
The master of the castle is coming...
I must disappear!
Then out of the blue I'm back outside,
Where the winds still blow and blow.
Where the castle was a moment before,
There is only a bare patch of snow.
I blink in confusion and stare and stare,
For where did the ice castle go?
Then I shrug my shoulders and turn away.
How could anyone know?
Author notes
pensitivity's PIF contest - prompt option: snow dream. username: Coriander.
Contest by DirtyLittlePrincess: Option 5: Whatever you can think of
Be creative
A contest entry
- Castles in the snow. by PoetryPuppy.
425 points, ended October 13, 2008, 7 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Options!!!! Anything goes. by Jaffa-.
550 points, ended December 10, 2008, 52 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What is your favourite part? What would you change or improve?
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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I thought it was awesome and very creative.
My favourite part was
''Every room is layered with frost,
And lined with crystal glass.
Everywhere I look I see
Signs that say 'don't trespass.'''
You could feel the cold, see the frosting, feel yourself slipping. Amazing write, well done. Good luck -
Thanks for following the rules! Great descriptions, "Ice Castle"...
"I shiver with realization,
And squint at the castle's glare.
This castle doesn't belong to me,
So if I die here will it care?"
That's my favorite part, makes the reader feel small against that great icy magnificence...
thanks for your entry!

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Very nice story and wonderful rhyme. A place that is here for a moment then gone, leaving one bewildered. Best to you.
Mouser

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thank you for your lovely poem, love Kiarna
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Good rhyme and rhythm. Amazing imagery. You have alot of talent.
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Oh My Gosh... I love this poem great imagary, and a wonderful ryhme and flow, Keep writing^-^


1 - 6 of 6





