Be my Fool,
Take me beneath the apple tree of Eden.
There is no Snake to whisper in our ear,
Yet we sin like Adam and Eve before.
Be my Fool,
Dance with me on the Plains of the Moon.
Embrace in our low gravity ecstasy.
Be my Fool
Hold me tight in our rocket ship,
Blistered from our lunar excursion.
You know I don’t wear shoes.
Be my Fool,
Be my King,
Be my One and Only.
And again be my Fool.
Comments
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Nicely done
I, myself, am a "romantic fool" so I quite enjoyed this read
Wishing you all the very best in your writing endeavors! -
hummm I liked it all even the repeated words of "be my Fool" worked for me til the very ending. I think that last line can be done without. The last stanza ends it well enough for me. Just my suggestion and you don't have to follow it at all. Thanks for sharing this with us.
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The capitalisation in this was incredibly interesting and really made you take note of the words, and their importance in each stanza.
I thought the ending could have been more hard hitting, it seems like the repetition could have been more subtle, referenced to the beginning without saying it in so many words.
Thank you -
Pretty!
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