Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

I Am Gone

Hidden from
the world,
I am cloaked
behind dying leaves.

You can't see
me now; for
my mask and I
have become one
with nature.

Author notes

Okay, if I did this wrong, I'm sorry. I'm a noobie.

But, this is my entry. Please enjoy. I tried my best, considering I had to rewrite it 5 times to get 25 words exactly.

A contest entry

I want honesty.... Pwease?

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • etoile
    October 8, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i loved your take on the prompt. especially in the first stanza. it was a great write and the imagery was fantastic as well.


  • innocence jaded.xx
    October 5, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    You did this flawlessly :] This is exactly what I was looking for. I love how you kind of personified camouflage, it was so beautifully written. I especially loved "cloaked behind dying leaves"; industrious & intense. The power seeps throughout each line.

    & I know what you mean by having to rewrite something 5 times :P
    haha, thanks for entering ! Good luck :)
    ♥Manduh 


  • innocence jaded.xx
    October 5, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wonderful !

    your word to be inspired by is:

    camouflage.

    go with it where you please =]
    ♥