October skies are crying
Dark clouds release their tears
Drops of pain
Disguised as rain
Give drink to all my fears
The wind blows cold and bitter
Despair upon a breeze
Souls frustration
Exasperation
That brings me to my knees
The voice of past still calling
The future takes a bow
My bridges burned
A lesson learned
And where do I go now
A fool who sees the folly
Of how his life was spent
In chasing dreams
Results it seems
Of a life of discontent
A contest entry
- October by ea.
700 points, ended November 1, 2008, 34 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - FEELINGS by starving4perfection.
1900 points, ended August 30, 69 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Life is Pain by mitchybaby.
1000 points, ended August 31, 36 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT!!! This piece hits so close to home its scary! If I were to write a poem for my own contest I would bet this would be what I would have written!! You are an amazing poet, hats off to you! Thank you for entering
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wow i loved that!!
'
The voice of past still calling
The future takes a bow
My bridges burned
A lesson learned
And where do I go now'
my favourite stanza dont really know why just like how you worded it
thank you for the entry and good luck!!
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ooops I forgot the applauds
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I tend to make light of pain .... except my own. I will try not to deflect my feelings here. This is written with exceptional rhyme and I really like the rhyme scheme by the way. You manage to put raw, painful feelings down on the page. That is hard for me ... My most painful and personal feelings stay deep inside where others cannot see nor judge. Hard to be a really good poet unless one can remove such inhabitions.
Which you have. All of my applauds my friend. -
Excellent
When people read you, like this poem, they see, hear, and feel in their minds what a real poem is.
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A poem that flows so wonderfully well with excellent rhyme pattern All in all a wonderful read Good luck in the contest
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You have a solid rhyming piece here which brings the reader into the season of reckoning. Thank you for this view of October; it does speak to the third stage of maturation before that final Winter.
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Ahh, wonderful, wondeful, so bittersweet, reading your beautiful words with a growing sense of sorrow... As always it's the flow that really stands out of your work. And the rhyme is just perfect, it feels so natural. Take care x
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I had to read it more than once because it read so wonderfully. I very much enjoy the smoothness of your words ^_^
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nah ... you on your knees? I hope that this is just a muse or that you penned it awhile back. Whatever the case, it is filled with emotion and you allow the reader to find that place inside of you that feels deep pain and hopelessness.
Smile; Jesus loves you. (but I'm his favorite
) just a joke and hoping you still have your sense of humor. 
This is beautiful btw. We had rain yesterday and we really needed it. The soil here just drinks it in.
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