In theory, love will languish ‘round
Long after it has gone,
Sweet memory, that silent sound
That wakes the soul at dawn.
When recalled themes patrol the mind,
Rewind those dreams of blissful prime,
Relays that sense,
Replays that sense,
Although past tense meets present time.
In theory, love will languish ‘round
Despite what’s right or wrong,
Treat memory to sighs profound
When triggered by a song.
Each word, each thought will then combine,
As uncalled stream flows fast behind
Surveys new view,
Conveys new view,
And all that's true reveals sublime.
In theory, love will languish ‘round
A spirit that is strong.
Regardless of a proving ground,
A feeling you prolong.
Like prayers whispered in a shrine,
Or glass of sacramental wine
Obeys a thirst,
Allays a thirst,
A power versed by love divine!
© 2008 Joy A. Burki-Watson
Author notes
The Trijan Refrain, created by Jan Turner with slight variation
Source: http://www.shadowpoetry.com/resources/wip/types.html
A contest entry
- The Selflessness of Love... Huge Points! Form Poems. by PerVirtuous.
3000 points, ended October 18, 2008, 15 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please take time to share your comments ...
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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As always, faultless form and function. Your poetry literally defines the word. In theory love is a many splendored thing, especially when it finds you! Good luck in the contest.
Sincerely,
Leo Long
ps. It's simply beautiful m'lady.

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Straight to the finalist list.


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"...A feeling you prolong..."
The repetition within the form
lends itself to holding on,
the desire for the feeling to prolong.
Perfect closing line.


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Beautifully done with the form, although love never does follow the in theory logistics that it shoudl ... which is why it's so haphazard i suppose, but, taking from the contest thoughts you took the perfect route with this
thanks for sharing it with us
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That's fabulous....
I was thinking of entering this contest, I just changed my mind, your poetry is superb, there's no other way to describe it...this ones headed straight for gold Joy
Good luck
John


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The meter and rhyme of this poem are a pleasure to read, and the form is interesting. I like "Although past tense meets present time." The middle stanza explains the conversion of loss to gain very well.


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Matter preserves through time; energy transports through space
"In theory, love will languish ‘round
Despite what’s right or wrong,
Treat memory to sighs profound
When triggered by a song."
Just watched CASABLANCA again last night on Turner Classic Movies (song - "As Time Goes By")
Media (and memory) preserve experience through time. Energy transports recorded experience through space.

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A form that's new to me and one which looks quite tricky. You handle it very well and with seeming confidence. I like both the poem's content and its technicalities. Well done.
Bill

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Is this where I say "Bah Humbug?" Ignore me, I'm cynical when it comes to love.

I like the reiteration of the first line. "In theory, love will languish 'round" it adds to the classical feel of the poem. So that is a Trijan Refrain, I have always wondered...ok, I'd never heard of it before.
A theory of love, I like that title for it seems to touch slightly upon my skeptical nature, though probably unintentional, we curmudgeons can find cynicism in the most optimistic works. For to me, the word, "theory" hints that it's certainly not an applicable practice, just theory. For in truth:
In practice, love will drop stone dead
sooner than it's been said
Sweet memory? A hollow head!
likely some cold instead.

But it's a beautiful poem, I think one of the better I've read by you...from a pure reading standpoint.


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