From my
first encounter
as a boy, with that
older girl next door
vaginal visions
pervade my thoughts
twitching
pink muscles, sucking
like undersides of
sea urchins
and what a dangerous
delicacy they are.
Author notes
for some strange reason, Frank Zappa's, "Dirty Love" is playing in my mind. Eh, I'm just odd like that.
A contest entry
- ugly love by Cat.
2750 points, ended October 24, 2008, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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your strongest piece that i've read- and let me tell you why..
the image you presented is just brilliant- the sea urchin
and then calling it a delicacy- you really found something with that..
now if i can be so bold..
i would dump the first stanza.. i think it is a poor start to the brilliance that follows...
or i would
dramatically alter it to take the adjectives out- put her name in
very well done.
m
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Duly noted m. check it out now and tell me what you think.
mj.
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omg
so now snorkeling takes on a new meaning when i see a sea urchin
lol
loved the feel of hunger in this whole thing - true naughtiness in the middle there yet started with such an innocent boy...
loved how he was corrupted
Thank you so much for taking the time to enter this contest!!
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Yes you are "odd like that", and talented too!
BRAVO!
Loved this! Your visuals are stark, make me have nightmares why don't ya! Damn good imagery!
Much Love Always ♥
Renee
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Thanks.
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speechless
Love, Lane
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nawty girl next door!!! But... who can blame her really lol
This is brill!! Ahh yes, dangerous they can be!!
♥
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That's probably one of the reasons I don't eat certain shellfish
I do think the girl next door must have taught you a few things dear
Best wishes in the contest
Love Margaret
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Thanks.
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gave me giggles
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