He’s proud and he’s tough
and talks mighty rough
and wears a tee that says
“Number One Dad.”
And he’s bigger and smarter—
a tear-you-aparter.
Can’t you see he’s
the Number One Dad?
She is clay still in spin,
love sketched on her skin—
her bold lines stretched
to the thinnest of threads.
When he drinks, he assaults
and insults with no halt.
Please concede he’s
a Number One Dad.
She’s the fragrance of heaven,
praying freely for leavens.
But he’s got a stopper
to ferment her head.
For he’s a liar, a cheater,
a talented beater.
Bruise-free magic
by Abraca-Dad.
Then he’ll kiss up and promise,
then slap without notice—
his debris of good nature
on a jet stream of bad.
And she’s hopeful, yet tremblin’,
paying fees to that gremlin—
believes in the crust
but not in the bread.
While her brave, little warrior
sucks out potions brewed to worry her—
a child with a heart
where demons cannot tread.
And what a foul biz
to say the child’s his—
he’s just a donor
with nothing to add.
For his failing affection
floods the nosebleed section.
He’s a flailing-foam-finger-
flipping Number One Dad.
And he thinks we’re impressed,
but we know he’s a pest—
be he a king,
a bum, or a Ben.
For he, like the rest,
thinks that one is the best.
Can’t see he’s the lowest
on a scale of one through ten.
So, three cheers (if you must)
for a soul as good as rust.
To the grace-despisin’, shirt-vertisin’,
vocalizin’ dumb surmisin’,
kick-him-to-the-cold-horizon
Number One Dad.
A contest entry
- What is your definition of a LOSER???? PW..PW..PW Maybe it's you yourself. by echo-ink.
470 points, ended October 21, 2008, 14 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Wonderfully Written
I loved every word of this poem. The imagery was fantastic expressing the pain and sadness of growing up within an abusive household. But yet the picture of a parent that has your heart if not your respect. I can relate and especially love the last stanza. God Bless, Jo-Ann
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Great emotional, edgy write. I really enjoyed your original style.
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I haven't seen a poem quite like this before.
For his failing affection
floods the nosebleed section.
He’s a flailing-foam-finger-
flipping Number One Dad.
I love the alliteration, the feeling and the meaning. What more does a poem need?
You definitely deserve to be a finalist! -
WOW! This is some pungent writing.
"For his failing affection
floods the nosebleed section.
He’s a flailing-foam-finger-
flipping Number One Dad.
So, three cheers (if you must)
for a soul (as) good as rust. First "as" disrupts rhythm; not needed.
To the grace-despisin’, shirt-vertisin’,
vocalizin’ dumb surmisin’,
kick-him-to-the-cold-horizon
Number One Dad."
Wonderful spit it out language! These are my two favorite quatrains. The rhythm mostly works vwey well, occasionally there's an extra syllable that could be deleted. Try reading this out loud to check.
Great poem, just polish a tiny bit.
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Holy Shitsky.
Yessa!
off you go to the finalists.
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