Though form of the laurel she takes
Her beauty still shines through
Apollo on the hunt for her
but he couldn't find her there
Her virginity is safe for now
A contest entry
- Gimme 30 Brilliant Words Picture Prompt by Paloszoo.
450 points, ended October 15, 2008, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Great story told here. I like it a lot. Certainly a unique take on the prompt! Thanks so much for entering my contest. Be proud of your work! It’s an honor to have it shown here!
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oh yes, different take for sure, life is a test for us
to reach out and try to win, good take on the picture, good luck
Linda
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In line 4 I think you mean "find her there" - one of those typos that spellcheck doesn't catch.
I like this very much, but can't figure out why, in this case, you moved the verb to the end of line 1. If you do that with line 2 (you would get "Her beauty through still shines") or line 5 (you would get "Her virginity safe for now is") and it would begin to sound like Yoda!
Apart from that minor gripe, these are 30 pretty brilliant words.
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Thank you for pointing that out, I fixed her/here.
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I loved this. So much said, and so uniquely in so few words. Looking at that image I would never have thought of what you've portrayed here. You have a brilliant imagination, and a lovely way with words. Thanks for sharing. Best of luck in the contest!
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