Today is the day, today is the day but what is it about today I just can’t put my finger on. Nothing new, Nothing exciting so what is it about today. God I hate not being able to think or even imagine what it was about this day, this plain ordinary day.
I didn’t win the lottery, god I never win that stupid thing, so what is it about this damn day. I didn’t get fired & no devastating tragedy has struck the world, so what is it about today, what makes this day so special out of everyday I have lived and breathed. But I just still comprehend this sense of all good this weird peace this cease fire of chaos this misplacement of emotions. So why today to finally have calm quite peace; but why today and why does it feel so bad so tragic? SO why today, why has the sky turned black & the grass blue, the river red and the wind dead.
Why today, today, today, when nothing makes sense and nothing as it seems what is it that makes me double take it all in on this dream like today. No problems no sirens not even a siren or a scream no one fighting on the t.v.
What is wrong with me why cant I just except everything today why does today make me feel insane. This is everything I have ever wanted everything I have ever prayed for, god damn today, god damn today. Why do I feel guilty panic stricken & sad when nothing bad has happen today. I just cant put my finger on this peaceful hollow day but why today and no other day just this ugly blissful day. What does it mean why is it just me and no body else? why is it just me living in this mind-numbing hell? No one to talk too no one to tell how I feel on this god forsaken day today this perfect slice of hell.
All alone staring out the window to a baron skeletal world but why today, oh how I wish I was dead on this strange & frigid today. But what good will it do what will I achieve if today I cease to be, is that the point this bastard today is trying to teach me. But what scares me most, what really makes me think is that there are no shadows when the sun hits and object, no breeze that gently cools my warm skin on a hot day.
Still it is strange no birds singing no church bells ringing no sounds at all, not even the annoying coo-coo clock on my wall. Damn today how I miss it all, what I would give to hear the neighbors barking dog waking me in the morning to a bright loud day. I hate today but still why today what was so important about this mind blistering, emotional shattering day. I can’t even remember my name, my family but what I can remember from my drunken memory is my wife telling me good luck and I will see you later.....Her last word to me was I love you which still echos in my ears today. But why would she tell me good luck and I would see you later, what does it mean.
I have based my whole world on facts and reality’s, so why don’t any of my facts or reality’s fit on this strange day. Am I a ghost a dream of some little kids sick fantasy what am I why cant I solve this puzzle this enigma of a day.
Still the sky is black, and the grass blue, the river red, and the wind still dead, but what is it about this day that makes my blood boil my skin crawl. What I would give to hear sweet words of somebodies words, today my prayers were answered today my wishes come true but damn today damn my mistress today.
I am trapped in a jail of my own desire of my own wants and needs but I still can’t figure out why today I still cant figure out why me? I have committed no crimes and sold no lies.
Am I but a souless man?
Author notes
Im sorry I tried to make it 700 but it ended up to be like 705 (even if it doesnt seem like it.)
I wrote in word and kept track of the word count. I had to go to like 705 because it wouldn't sound right with 700 words, but i tried. I hope you like.
Im not a man by any means but i think the story can explain itself.
I hope you like, worked hard 
A contest entry
- Fiction On AllPoetry? Call Me Rebel! by Yemassee.
875 points, ended October 3, 2008, 11 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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It's an interesting premise, this man who has no idea what or who he is...there are a few hints...apparently he'd been drinking...he has a wife...but the reader doesn't know much else. I'm a little confused as to the mistress, who or what that is and how it fits in the story.
A few suggestions. It's a little rough in places, where it could use more punctuation to help make the story smoother and more reader-friendly. I might have gone a little deeper into the mystery so that the reader had at least a closer idea to why he is in this situation.
I would definitely reduce all the "(to)days" used in this story. I counted something like 49 of them in this short story. I understand that you want to set the mood, but you can do that through explaining the scene, the situation, not just by reiterating words that add nothing to the story.
I do like the Kafka-like feel of being there but not really understanding where "there" is...though at the end you do seem to hint that there might be "guilt" over a relationship...guilt ofver a lie probably, some added clarification here would add a lot to your story I believe. A few typos, like (cant/can't, souless/soulless and coo-coo/cuckoo) but nothing too distracting.
As I said, I do like the feel of mystery and that hint that maybe guilt is the major player here, I would have maybe got into explaining that a little sooner.
Thank you for entering the story in my contest. It was an interesting story.
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Hey thanks for the pointers you gave me for the story.
It helps a lot because i usually dont get enough pointers on to help me grow as a writer, so i appreciate that very much.
Your honesty means a lot to me.
And thanks for the honorable mention i appreciate it very much.
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