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Sweet Release

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I have stirred my love potion
Sweetest passion I brew
Romantic mischief stirs

As I bare you my treats
Savoring loves potions
We slid between the sheets

After we savor love potions
Which wets our appetite
Passionate desire will arise
When you and I unite

Passion meets passion
In passions forever embrace
Twisting our bodies
Screaming from deep inside,
no foundation to hold.
I lock my legs around your thighs.
Until we both reach such a sweet release!

Author notes

pic http://bateor.deviantart.com/art/Sensual-Undressing-88854198
I hope this was what you we're kind of looking for. I enjoyed it either way. This is my first time sharing a poem like that. ~~Iridessa~~

A contest entry

GIVE IT TO ME!!!!!

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 11 of 11

  • xxRainbowDawnxx
    December 26, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Some very hot and sensual ideas here, I hope that you er... get good use out of them, shall we say? Might have to lend a couple of potions, not that I need them at the moment, my man and I are doing fine there! XD

  • Eric Hanyon
    October 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This was exciting Iridessa. You did a great job, especially for your first time. Congratulations on the trophy.


  • solitarytear
    October 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    wow

    sissy......HOT write.....steaming HOT.....i'm still learning the sensual side of poetry.....but this was amazing......every word......hugsss you


  • Galaxy2
    October 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    'I lock my legs around your thighs
    Until we both reach such a sweet release!'
    Wow!
    my favorite position...
    I'd love to releas in that beautiful posture...

    Thank you...and wet kisses, honey!
    Galaxy2


  • VoltaicHypnosis gold member
    October 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is beautiful, the end is strong and that is so what you want in a piece... this, however, it has an air of... 'first-time' I am not so fond of the repetition of love potion, and I wouldn't call this erotic, sensual definately.

    In all, this is a beautiful piece, but I think it needs more strength, and a more powerful ending.


    xxx


    • Iridessa MoonFlower
      October 1, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      You are so right it is my first time writing this kind of poetry, I didn't know if I should have went deeper & where I should have started at. I shall revise this poem. If you think I could seriously do better. Thank you for you encouragement. ~~Iridessa~~


  • Swangrnv gold member
    October 1, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    hhmmm...

    very nice for a first time. I like it alot pretty steamy my friend!


  • Riamh
    October 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I like this....a lot. Thank you for entering it, Iridessa MoonFlower.

    Slayer


  • hotchocolate gold member
    October 1, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I enjoyed reading this write! I wish you luck in the contest

    Passion meets passion
    In passions forever embrace
    Twisting our bodies
    Screaming from deep inside,
    no foundation to hold.
    I lock my legs around your thighs.
    Until we both reach such a sweet release

1 - 11 of 11