While I flourish my world burns,
around me. Touch my fingertips,
kiss me, don't you touch my lips.
And yet the fool still yearns.
I'm dying inside. A statement such
she uses for attention's touch,
I never cared so little so much,
a hack, a cough, that's your fault. Tough.
Chalk like simile, hand goes up.
Back to lips I close my eyes
to hide me from the closest lies.
Simiar to your foot in mouth. Up, goes, the, cup.
The typical "EMOtional" metaphor of blood
to reality travel you, or a shove.
Be resonable cry you not, I love
the misunderstanding of the corporeal clod.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
=]
i really liked this, and i tend to agree with marc (strange i no!) i particularily likeed the EMOtional bit. i also agree that it seems your confused over two people and like marc said, one was depressing you. i did find some of it hard to understand (but that always happens as your so bloody cryptic!) =] well done, a brilliant write.
xx celphie xx
-
As much as I like the language and formatting of this, for once in my life, I dont understand the metaphors.... Which is bad for me..... It seems you are going inbetween two people, one who you are seeing as as a depressant? "Dying inside" and the other person, I can't seem to understand and seperate from the other stanzas.....
The CAPSing of EMO in "EMOtional" was quite cleaver....
I don't understand corporeal clod, although I do remember you mentioning it in another one of your writes (Or something similar) which I cant seem to remember at the moment.......
Anyway, maybe i'll understand it when i'm not so mentally tired......
See ya
Adding your comment:
