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Follow The Heart.

She lives each day like it's her last
tracing treasures that pulse like sighs.
Life so fragile it breaks like glass,
her face is lined round saddened eyes.
So long ago her heart denied,
but now she casts all doubts to chance.
This heart's desire is her guide,
the past bears not a second glance.

Author notes

A first attempt lol
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ HUITAIN ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
A Spanish form of poetry, the huitain revolves around the number eight:

- there are eight lines in the poem, and each line contains eight syllables.

The rhyme scheme is ababbcbc.
The prompt for this contest is: lessons learned

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • mysticstorm gold member
    October 31, 2008

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    What a beautiful write...such lovely lines and flow...very soft and gentle to read...beautiful form...always nice to try something new...
    Best to you!


  • CitrineSunrise silver member
    October 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I am always pleased when a poet steps outside his/her comfort zone and tries a new type of poetry. The wording is well done with nice imagery. Unfortunately this does not follow the hutain rhyme scheme which is: The rhyme scheme is a.b.a.b.b.c.b.c. The second line should rhyme with "eyes, denied and guide". I'm sorry that I did not read notice this before the contest closed for I would have suggested an alternative such as "inside". Thank you for your entry. Peace, Liz


  • NeonRose
    October 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Lovely words and thoughts. "the past bears not a second glance"...but this poem deserves it! Best to you in the contest.


  • Pete Greenslade gold member
    October 1, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    i am dyslexic so will not try. great effort x


  • Paloszoo gold member
    October 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, this is beautiful. I've never tried this form before. You make it look and sound so effortless and natural. This is a sure winner! Good luck in the contest!


  • playjazz67
    October 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Not only a lovely poem but special in that you would take the effort to try a totally new form.

    Jim


  • ZachP gold member
    October 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    For a first attempt at a form, this is pretty darn good! I guess this shouldn't come as a shock, as this is *~you~* that we are talking about

    A simple but deep and introspective look at life I can so totally hear someone playing the melody of Roxanne's "Listen to your heart" in the background on the piano (oh wait, that's my iTunes!)

    Well, still

    Good luck in the contest, my friend
    ~Zach

1 - 8 of 8