aching limbs
and torn lips.
i know the girl
i used to be
and i ache
to be her
one day,
when nothing requires
attention.
i used to be her,
clasping cigarettes
and not regretting.
drinking until i hit
the point in which i couldn't care,
or wouldn't remember.
i was free and lively,
friendly and easy.
her who didn't care,
down on scarred knees,
with wrists that bled.
you could whisper
to me your love,
and i wouldn't let you
hold me down.
i'd smile and never cry,
and i wouldn't remember
this the next day.
one day we will meet.
Author notes
meltdown.
http://allpoetry.com/poem/2659430
i used to be her.
i left me behind a long time ago,
and maybe i am a happier person now.
but i was happy in other ways then.
anyway, this is me, for you contest <3
everything just connects now.
A contest entry
- For my favorites and those that have me on their favorites by whiterabbit..
400 points, ended December 11, 2008, 23 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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there's not a day that i don't think about who i used to be and not want to go back. and then somehow it changes, you stop doing those things and start only thinking about it. i think i've seen too much.
and i'm not sure i'm happy, but other people say this is better.
perfect poem. reading it brought me back <3
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i know. i just don't really know who i want to be anymore.
thank you
<3
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I love this and I can really relate to this. I know all too well what it's like to want to be the person that you once were. I can also relate to what you are saying in your author's notes. It's hard to tell at what time you were happier. Great write doll.
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i agree with the happy thing.
i love your new picture btw, stunning <3 -
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aw, thank you
♥
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I think it's really strange when that happens: you wish you were still the way you were a couple months or a couple years back. In this piece, through your lanuage and structure you captured that feeling perfectly. It made me long to be the way I was a few years ago, it reminded me of how I thought this the other night and how it killed me in the weirdest way. Even your author's notes tackled and conqured the subject matter flawlessly. You're different so the happiness and sorrow are different from what they used to be. It's like once you change, even if it's slightly, you feel things and react to them so much differently.
The second stanza did an excellent job describing the situation. The one after that was just gorgeous. It felt so personal, like I was reading your diary or something. All the little details and words were woven together beautifully.
xoxo
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