I stomp, I stomp, I stomp,
Watching life desert me.
A shrinking, slithering, sneaking escape.
I stomp, I stomp, I stomp,
Scarlet and stinking.
My surroundings slip
Into shrubs
Or silence.
A contest entry
- Pure Emotion! by xSarahx.
600 points, ended September 30, 2008, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
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From stomping to slithering a swell script! Your repetition drives the feeling deeper and deeper - great job here. Love the ending ...silence...powerful and compelling.


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Very well written. It made me think of people as snakes betraying others and deserting them, sneaking away and the frustration of stomping or trying to get rid of them. Am I close at all? That's just my take on it, I could be wrong. Regardless, I enjoyed reading it.


