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Acoustic silence

Acoustic silence, how it Sings to the senses
but could it allow glimpse, behind fences?

Acoustic silence, our will sings through out time
but can it tear down fences,  you've built in your mind?

 

 

 raw emotion in the pen

turning paper into wind

shedding iron, bleeding ink

to carry you on mental wing

bleeding ink, the blood of soul

making diamonds from lumps of coal

calling on the love of loves

turning pigeons into doves

ships of thought meander through

but always on a path that's true

 


Acoustic silence, it bleeds the ink of your soul
but can the ink turn you, from lead unto gold?


Acoustic silence, how it Sings to the senses
but could it allow a glimpse, behind fences?

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hwyuQbIb0Xs

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Comments

1 - 18 of 18

  • jessicams
    June 11

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    This poem is SOOOooo beautiful, it possesses wisdom, creativity, truth, passion, awareness..there is really no other poem I have read that contains so much of what I love. This is another of my most favorite poems!


  • peridotPixi
    April 30

    Edit | Reply
    i really like the pateren and flow you have used in this poem and how that you are wanting to allow a glimps
    keep writing
    ~Amy


  • rite
    November 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    We'll de-tune and re-tune
    To different frequencies
    And quite soon the croon
    Will amend dependencies
    That trap us in this curse
    Cast by the faux universe


  • Jesann gold member
    October 25, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Mmmmm...really liking your poetic style !!!
    Love the lines "Ships of thought meander through but always on a path that's true"
    "Acoustic silence, how it Sings to the senses but could it allow a glimpse, behind fences? "


  • Foretold-Events
    October 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Really enjoy your words...

    Very wonderful words of truth and wisdom. Like your style and I never read much of others poems on here as you can tell very easy. After Seven years on here I have not found that many who are really inspired by real world events and also are there to help bring a message of change. I really enjoy everything you do and who you are.

    Regards,

    D. Clark

    Author "Third Cycle Poetic Prophecy"


    Right now is a time for change.

  • pelo801
    October 12, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i read this one and the previous, i enjoy reading what you write, you have a unique style, and always have something interesting to say. it seems like with these two, yor were dabbling with lyrics, pretty cool


  • jamiedoring
    October 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Hey you! Its been awhile

    I can see your still slinging your unique style with all those images, word choice and rythym...This was great!

    Jamie


    • teddybare gold member
      October 3, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      thanks jamie

      great to hear from you... hope you are doing as good as you look
      and yeah i had a bit of a writing block or my pen ran out of ink momentarily

      thanks for the comment and such i got some catch up to do on all the fantastic comments i've received in my relative absense.. so i'll put you on the long list of returns

      youre still hotter than a two dollar pistol and it was great to hear from ya

      with love and unity
      ~TeddyBare~


  • tortured-heart
    October 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    this is a great piece of work...

    "calling on the love of loves
    turning pigeons into doves
    ships of thought meander through
    but always on a path that's true"

    love it! did you know that a pigeon is a dove? they're called rock doves...ok enough of my random knowledge...it rocked my socks off
    peace, love, & cheese


  • petalblue2
    October 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is great, I love that term acoustic silence!
    My fav was
    "raw emotion in the pen

    turning paper into wind

    shedding iron, bleeding ink

    to carry you on mental wing

    bleeding ink, the blood of soul

    making diamonds from lumps of coal

    calling on the love of loves

    turning pigeons into doves

    ships of thought meander through

    but always on a path that's true"

    This whole part was truly inspired, I've always loved the idea of the paper and pen having a life of it's own and leading you through it's intentions. Not sure if that is really what you had intended but it was simply amazing. Much love! Kelly

    • teddybare gold member
      October 3, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      you called it blue

      nailed it right on the head .. thanks


  • Snowing Kisses gold member
    September 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Hi gladto see youdefeated your writers block. This poem rings in my ears, and makes my toungue fizz, but thats just cos as you know im a word junkie.This is a really good strong poem and the rhyming is really clear cut. I love the short little verses followed by the long one, which seems to run away ion its own steam. I dont know if you mean it that way, but it sort of fits well with a poet who suddenly gets a new creative burst. Really good write thanks and take care littlefishone


  • stylization
    September 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    It's awesome!

    Woah. Suprisingly, I liked this quite a lot! I'm not a fan of the capatalized "Sing," but that's just me. I like the phrasing of "acoustic silence," and I especially like the way the structured couplets relate to the more circular, flowing, stream-of-consciousness feel that the second part has to it. I'd suggest adding maybe an extra space or two at the end of it, but that's just me. Great write!


  • Hikari Lady
    September 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I liked these lines:
    "Acoustic silence, it does sing through out time
    but can it tear down fences, you've built in your mind?"

    Really liked this short poem, it ryhmes very well and flows. Liked that you repeated the first stanza at the end once more. Glad to see you writing again!


    • teddybare gold member
      September 29, 2008

      Edit | Reply

      lol hey thanks for the read

      just a note that a added to it a bit .. ok well a whole chorus actualy i left it out before but decided at the last minute to put in


      • Hikari Lady
        September 29, 2008
        Edit | Reply
        I really like this chorus, such vivid words! But I can't tell you if it goes well with the poem as a whole or no ( I am not qualified enough to see ). But I loved the words you used, specially these:
        "making diamonds from lumps of coal
        calling on the love of loves
        turning pigeons into doves"

        You can guess the reason is because I love doves, lol. xD

        ~Noor

1 - 18 of 18