Is an Inuit house without an inside toilet called an "ig"?
Hollywood is bringing out a cheap re-make of a Sci Fi classic - "The Mattress Spring-loaded".
Are Allegations half way between the Alleghenys and the Appalachians?
A mistress is something that comes between a mister and a mattress.
Cartoon graffiti: "Elmer Fudd splits hares!"
This one is absolutely true - the instruction manual for a satellite orbital prediction software is in an MS Word file named "whatsup.doc"!
Transylvanian graffiti: "Dracula sucks!"
If the family that prays together stays together, thank God my mother-in-law is an atheist!
No dear, the kettle isn't boiling - the water in it is!
One cob to another cob: "When I found out that my pen was expecting a cygnet, I had to give her a ring!"
Graffiti on a "Harwich for the Continent" poster: "Frinton for the Incontinent".
Baaa - that's easy for ewe to say!
(that's enough one-liners - ed.)
Adding your comment:
I laughed a lot of times and sometimes laughed two times for the same one. 
My fav is "Dracula sucks." lol YAY for being funny, and you are. 
