Alone, cold, and trembling
Here on this floor
I watch everything from above
Just like some dream
Sitting on a floor
Cold as can be
With the sharpest knife
I can find in hand
Death begins
Slashes on these little wrists
Blood dripping with the tears
The start of a little puddle
With no feeling of this pain
One blink of an eye
And it’s all taken away
I'm somewhere
Where I shouldn't be
Familiar faces around me
Tears in their eyes
I try to cheer them up
But they can’t seem to see me
I walk right through the crowd
Down the isle to a casket
My name engraved on top
This is my funeral
One blink of an eye
The memory is back
a small little body
On this bloody cold floor
Shivers that are uncontrollable
Tears you can’t hold back
Fears you'll never conquer
This is the life I had
My death I'm watching over
But as something else
I'm watching it as a ghost
With the thought of Something haunting over me
One blink of an eye
A new memory comes
I'm back at home
But something is different
I'm in my room. . .
But its clean
I'm in my room. . .
And the beds made. . .
. . . there's someone in my room
I don't recognize . . .
One look at her face . . .
And I knew at once . . .
And was my mother
The new her
She’s been crying day and night
It seems by the look of her eyes . . .
Where is dad though?
What does he think of my death?
I walk through the door
And down the hall I use to know
I walk down the stairs I use to walk down
Every day
I go into the kitchen where I use to eat
And there the father who I use to have
It seems he isn't as long gone as my mother
In the feeling of pain
Coming from my death . . .
He isn't upset
But how?
I look and look
Into his face
He’s . . . why. . . he’s happy
One blink of an eye
And its all gone away
I'm somewhere its black
And I hear cries of terror
I find the truth
In the blackness of the night
One light shows me the truth
My mother . . . She’s next
My father is standing over her . . .
He’s beating her like before
Something I tried to ignore the signs of
Something I didn't want to believe
But the blindfold is gone
And its right before my eyes
She suffering pain each day
Because people like my father
Are brought into this world
One blink of an eye
And I see my memory flash before
My eyes
And I see what I couldn't remember
Something the blind fold wouldn't let me remember
My father . . . He abused me
But I didn't want to believe it.
I didn't want to remember. . .
But really now I cant
This is the reason why I laid on that floor
This is the reason why my life ended so soon
I was stopping my misery,
My pain...
His torture
My mother,
She’s still suffering,,,
Have the strength I whisper
Have the strength
Fight back I whisper
You’re stronger
She lifts herself to her feet
She looks him in the eyes
She says what she’s meant to say
It’s all your fault
It’s your fault I lost my baby
It’s your fault she’s gone
It’s your fault her life was what it was
It’s all your fault
I’d rather die for her
I’d rather die now
I’d rather be in heaven
Then in hell on earth with you
So take that knife
Take it now
Strike it in my heart
Let me die
But you better remember
I never should have loved you
She never should have either
You remember to dig my grave
And go to my funeral
Let them know
I died for my daughter
To go to heaven
With her to leave this hell on earth
This hell called you
Author notes
'Jesus feotus'
Written January 23rd, 2004
In a list
A contest entry
- Try your best, impress me please. by EojRepus.
300 points, ended February 8, 2004, 49 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
-
I enjoyed this poem. Well done, the format was longer than the previous yet still held poignancy and my attention span. I am beginning to like your style.
-Khrei. -
as i said, i dont want cutting, granted was emotional, plenty of it, but i dont care to see your scars.
peace , Eoj

