Pyramus as a child would speak
to his beloved Thisbe meak
by pressing his lips to the wall
that kept the two apart from all
that they might find were they to meet.
The cruelty of that wall proved sweet
when day by day they whispered through
its crack where ecstasy was soothed
against the stone; no lover's moan
was e'er as attentively known.
Once grown, their parents to defy,
they sought their love to rectify
and by a mulberry bush meet
outside the wall, white berries sweet
to eat of them in open view
but slain their blood its fruit imbrued
and thus the tree retained the mark
of slaughter in its berries dark.
Author notes
ea
painting by Hans Baldung, Pyramus and Thisbe
This story is from Ovid's "Metamorphoses" and was the precursor to "Romeo and Juliet." It was Shakespeare's favorite and he used it as the play within a play in "A Midsummer Night's Dream," as well.
A contest entry
- History Books Forgot about Us (And the Bible Didn't Mention Us.) by They Say Shannon.
600 points, ended November 27, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Romeo and Juliet by my02U.
480 points, ended December 8, 2008, 12 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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It's interesting that you decided to use the story of Pyramus and Thisbe to foreshadow the prompt... I hadn't thought of that... so I guess it's allowed. This is very creative, and I love the rhyme scheme! I love the gruesome imagery in the "white berries stained dark with blood" scenario. Great take, and good luck!
Luv,
Lovey
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Thank you, yes, it was Shakespeare's inspiration for Romeo and Juliet, according to several accounts.
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Hi, how nice to see one of the other stories from a midsummer's night dream, loved it, kind regards Di
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I always loved their story best. I did a modern reinactment of it in high school and fell in love. ... lovely poem it is always hard to put words and rhyme to a story that already has so much character, you did it with style
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Wow, this one's damn well written, such a old and majestic feel to it all. Wonderfully penned.
Best of luck in the contest
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Very good. I think it is in book 4 of Metamorphoses.
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Beautifully done. You are the best!
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Oh, wow.
I loved the way you used the rhyme in this piece.
Specifically I enjoyed,:
"when day by day they whispered through
its crack where ecstacy was soothed"
(Although ecstasy is spelt wrong. ;D)
I'm not so sure what happened at the end with the berries,though?
But overall this was a very nicely composed piece. (:
Good job and good luck! < -
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Hi and thank you,
You can find this story in Book IV: http://etext.virginia.edu/latin/ovid/trans/Ovhome.htm It is also the play that is included in Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream. The end is talking about how after they killed themselves, their blood stained the roots of the mulberry tree and caused the berries to change from white to dark. It is kind of a "How the Mulberries got their color." I omit the part of how they die but it is worth checking out this part in the poem. It is only three paragraphs long and is quite a good twist in the tale.
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