This marks the end of toys
the puppets are almost out of cotton
Shreds of white fluff all over the floor
chuckles at babysitter’s slave-picking
Bubblegum dares to smell her seat cushion
what a stinky old lady, we fall out laughing
Run into her room to swipe her bras
hide them between her mattresses
Finding her dead husband’s shiny gun
we’ve never seen one in real life
The sound was so loud
You slept with your eyes open...
and the puppets ran out of cotton
Author notes
Lines 9-10
A contest entry
- Ego Trip by Theasp.
525 points, ended October 26, 2008, 7 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
-
On second thought
the impact is great having worked as a nanny, none of my babes would do that, but the imagery is haunting. -
-
well this isnt a true story, well not for me anyway. had seen a special on cable and the thought of it freaked me out...so i wrote about it. thanks for taking a look at it, means a lot
-
-
ssounds like an earlhopkins poem
Daring, but the question was why do you think it is not successful?

-
This is a really great piece of writing, the more I read of your work, the more I want to, which is rare for me-easily distracted!! The innocence and childish pranks give way to such a stark ending, well crafted, leaving us reeling. Loved it. Peace


-
Oh my goodness
This was truly a sad and freightening write for children often in play and curiosity unwatched often never see tomorrow

-
love it. . . i thought it was gonna be some silly kids poem but the ending went off with a bang. . . Brilliant, very clever and emotional yet subtle and classy. . .
-
-
thank u for taking the time to read it, and ur comment. it means so much to me. thanks again
-
1 - 7 of 7




