All for You

and I can still hear your screams bouncing off the walls

I'll close my eyes night after night
To see the same dreams I've had since the night you left
And I'll plug my ears to drown out the sounds
Time after time again, like always.

You see, I tried to put it all behind me;
You and your yellow dress in the yard
The way you looked and saw who I was
and not once did you judge me... not once, not ever.

but... that's really all it took in the end, I guess

I know my apologies aren't enough anymore;
I repeat them over and over but you'll never go away
You're still dressed to kill with the knife in your back
Still screaming at me... I can still hear it.

I can't seem to forget the look in your eyes
As I finally showed you everything I was
How you held me close and begged for the truth
As if your eyes had been lying to you

You dropped down to your knees; the print is still there
and you held the soil close to your face;
Screaming to god you didn't fall for a killer
I could smell your tears like rain

And when you asked how many, I told you the truth
When you demanded how, I confessed
21 girls with new seams in their throats
But I promised I'd stop right away

I never wanted for you to hate me...but you said you wanted to see

My fingers went numb around the handle of the knife;
For you, I would end it quickly
Not once would I hurt you, my promise stays true
I swear I cried as you bled out on the floor

You said you wanted to see my insides
To know what I was truly about
You wanted to be with me whatever it took
Well darling, well darling...

I will water your flowers as you help them to grow
I will read to you every day
To keep you by my side; whatever it takes
My love, this was all for you.