http://www.unmuseum.org/kraken.htm
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The Kraken sleepeth: faintest sunlights flee
Like Indian reeds blown from his silver tongue
Were all too little, and of one to me.
Where rational ones saw islands rise and be
The superstitious knew its monstrous lung;
The Kraken sleepeth: faintest sunlights flee.
Squelch of giant squid on frenzied spree,
Its foul deeds, their devils worst among ...
Were all too little, and of one to me.
Icelandic fisher-folk upon the sea
Tenaciously to horror stories clung;
The Kraken sleepeth: faintest sunlights flee.
And some Leviathan imagined free
Where sea and Earth precariously hung ...
Were all too little, and of one to me.
But I ... I doubted sailors from the sea
With fright'ning tales for old or young!
The Kraken sleepeth: faintest sunlights flee
Were all too little, and of one to me.
Author notes
Metrical verse of iambic pentameters to the villanelle form.
Cento information: Line one of poem above is from Tennyson's 'The Kraken':
http://www.victorianweb.org/authors/tennyson/kraken.html
[LINE FOUR]
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Tennyson's 'Lady Clara Vere de Vere' : [Beginning of stanza four for line two above. ]
http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/The_Poet_(Tennyson)
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Line three above: It comes from Tennyson's dramatic lyric, 'Ulysses'.
[Line 21 from 'Ulysses']
http://www.victorianweb.org/authors/tennyson/ulyssestext.html
A contest entry
- Collab with a Great Poet by Peteskid.
2300 points, ended October 5, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - CELEBRATING POETRY AND POETS- ONE-DAY competition, "PREVIOUSLY WRITTEN" WORK ONLY by Vera Rich.
6000 points, ended November 26, 2008, 127 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Could this be you or one of yours?
Comments
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I think you misunderstood the requirements of the competition. The subject was stated clearly stated to be poems about Poetry and/or poets. Your subject (as the title states)is the Kraken - and incorporating lines into it from famous works of poetry does not change that fact.
And please note, I did make it clear that I do not like poems that depend on notes to explain them.
And there is surely no need to explain such a very well known classic form as the Villanelle. -
I love the tales of the Kraken and indeed, most
of the myths of sea, especially those of the Nordic
people. You capture a certain tug and pull here
with the way tongue responds to word sounds used.
My only brief and tiny stumble came here:
"Its foul deeds, their devils worst among"
where I had to repeat it several times to illicit
some formed meaning, but that could be my own
shortcomings! Thank-you for a marvelous read. Blue


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"kraken" so I have learned something new, the mystery of the sea and what she hides has wonderful themes, and this is a great one, it would scare me out of the water. A great collaboration with Tennyson, you took the lines and made them your own.




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this flowed so effortlessly that i didn't even realize it came to an end... well, until it did. amazingly well written.


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Greatly delightful!
Beautiful selection, stunningly combined by Lyndon flair.
Well done, Ron!
Love
Myra


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an excellent tale spun reveling the devision of human belief were fact and fiction are concerned.
I have a heart that believe and a mind that deals in truth which leaves me duly receptive to your message.
I found your word choice constant and your meter flawless. you have maintain perfect form while delivering a clear story and message.
An outstanding read!

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Your choice of poet and the tale, have woven a seascape and folklore to fill up the imagination. Add the skill of expression and form and we find a grand poem here.


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I think that iambic pentamenter adds greatly to the difficulty of writing a villanelle, and here it also seems to add to the flow, when read aloud. The rhyme scheme introduced by the cento lines is not easy to maintain in quiet, un-noticed end rhyme; but it is done seamlessly here. The poem has a narrative and done true to a well known legend; so many fine attributes to this poem. Excellent. Thank you for this fine entry into the contest and best of luck in the judging...PK


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This is a magical villanelle both in its content and its language. My favorite line is "Squelch of giant squid on frenzied spree." The words just tickle the tongue. Your style of writing is a perfect complement to Tennyson and the collaboration is seamless. Good luck in this contest. Peace, Liz
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Ahhh. Tennyson

Interesting rhythm in this delight. Wonderful visuals and strong anchors make this poem sing. I will read this again and again.
~Pamela

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I really like the rhymes that you have used in this piece, and the flow is wonderful (although I'm afraid I can't comment on the iambic-ness of it) - I love the story that this tells
the only thing that I noticed out of place was that you have a double space between 'devils' and 'worst' in the third stanza, and in the fifth there is a space before the comma in the last line. My mother wants to be reincarnated as a kraken
she used to tell me that all the time
Good luck in the contest!
Keep writing
Polly

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I'm always impressed with people who can pen this form beautifully, which you've done here. Suspenseful imagery! I really enjoyed it! Good luck in the contest!












