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Hourglass (Triolet)






I have between the fingers, life
In an hourglass unreal
With each grain's fall, strife
I have between the fingers, life

Time cutting as a sharp knife
Seconds and minutes to heal
I have between the fingers, life
In an hourglass unreal

On this time counter
Lays forgotten passages of history
The mind and the spirit gather
On this time counter

Taken away by the souther
Hours and days of glory
On this time counter
Lays forgotten passages of history

Imprisoned in a glass cell
Only sand is allowed to know
The answers hidden in the shell
Imprisoned in a glass cell

If just its elements could tell
Why time can't regrow
Imprisoned in a glass cell
Only sand is allowed to know





Author notes

This is the result of few previous attempts. John - macandrew- helped me with this triolet. He is great writing triolets, and I'm lucky to be one of his 'adopted' poet!
Thank you John!!! \f
Written January 22nd, 2004

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Comments

1 - 34 of 34
  • Hood-Wink!

    Wow! Powerful... Never wrote one of these myself. I like the form & you managed this beautifully! I love the content, flow & over all working of this poem. Bravo. You should really enter this in contests so more can read & admire this work. Enjoyed.


  • Yemassee gold member
    April 10

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    Just reading again, no reason whatsoever, just that I like it and wanted a quick tour down memory lane. Hope you are doing well.

  • Yemassee gold member
    February 20
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    ''hourglass unreal''
    I always thought that was a great expression.

    Ever since I read a story a long time ago, I've been interested in the notion of time, and it's concept, that is the reason I always loved this poem, and the idea of it being captured in the hourglass. For as sad as it sounds, that is our lives, those grains of sand, poring from the top to the bottom container.

    You've written more beautiful poems but this one matched my thoughts and peaked my interest.

    I like it as much today as I did October 8, 2005


  • Peteskid gold member
    January 26

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    I like this, asking the questions that we al sometimes wish could be, to have time obey and bring back something precious that has been lost to us...exellent...PK


  • 2lullabyhaven
    December 8, 2008

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    I just love love love triolets hahaha you have pumped out a great one here well worth some moxie


  • tara wilson gold member
    April 5, 2008

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    well, you went to my first poem to read it...so I am returning the favor!lol

    These are beautiful - the triolet is my favorite form - then the sonnet...I like how you have used 'sand' at time...and personified it here as 'time will only tell' -

    a lovely triple triolet!


    • Mari Goes gold member
      April 5, 2008
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      Thanks digger!
      This isn't really my first poem posted here. I cleaned the house some time ago and took down about 50 poems. All crap, I don't miss them lol

      • tara wilson gold member
        April 5, 2008
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        lololol at "digger"


        ..you're welcome...I know, I've done the same....I actually deleted 2/3's of my poems....maybe more..lol

  • Yemassee gold member
    October 8, 2005
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    Ahhhh, the wallpaper stinks!!!!

    And it's such a great poem too, my all-time favorite. How it speaks of time and how fleeting, and grasping at it, trying to make sense of it. It has such a desperate feel, sort of like man's essence I think. Such wistful thoughts begging to find a meaning and purpose.

  • TheOneRomeo
    April 22, 2004
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    Time is a thing that can go sometimes so fast that it seems that it has never even existed just vanished with the wind.Many underline deep meanings are sheltered in this poem of yours,lovely thing.Great triolet once again.
    Romeo


  • April 1, 2004
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    is a good poem,

    rolled betwen the forefinger and thumb - life

    i could see the repeating patterns, but i must confess i have no idea what a triolet is. well i have an idea now i suppose lol


  • Mari Goes gold member
    February 14, 2004
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    Thank you Glitch! I like this Triolet very much too

  • Glitch
    February 14, 2004
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    excellent! so very worthy of applause! iv loved both your triolets, the form is fabulous and the way you played this poem out with such great words and images is so impressive! great presentation too! well done on all counts!
    glitch

  • Tudor Rose
    February 2, 2004
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    I'm afraid I had a little bit too much to drink last night watching the supper bowl so I cant really express too well at the moment, but what I will say is this was a very good original piece and I liked it alot, thankyou so much for sharing your talent

  • Mari Goes gold member
    January 25, 2004
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    Hi Albert, I wanna thank you for all the nice comments on my work ana all the applauses too! Really appreciate! About the pic above, I tried to reduce it and I did, if it gets any smaller the hourglass will become just a line of sand. That is because I can't reduce good... Again thanks! Mari


  • agazeley gold member
    January 24, 2004
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    Great

    A really good poem with a wonderful line of thought. . . The picture goes well too - but I would reduce in size as it overpowers a wonderful write. . .

  • shomi
    January 24, 2004
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    delightfully delivered. actually elegant and dignified. reminds me, thematically, of hardy's 'at the time of the breaking of nations'. not to say that the two resemble each other in any way. great write. good read.

  • shomi
    January 24, 2004
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    delightfully dignified. reminds me of hardy's 'breaking of nations'. not to say that the two are similar in theme or style. elegant write. great read.

  • shomi
    January 24, 2004
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    delightfully delivered. actually elegant and dignified. reminds me, thematically, of hardy's 'at the time of the breaking of nations'. not to say that the two resemble each other in any way. great write. good read.

  • TimDiVito
    January 23, 2004
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    Wonderfully truthful

    Wonderful and well written piece of poetry Mari. I love it and it is so true--only the sand is allowed to know!! Take care and smile for me!! Sweet dreams Tim


  • hugh wyles silver member
    January 23, 2004
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    Dear Mari,
    Now I can read it all (and you didn't need to apologise,love) I think this is a TERRIFIC poem!! You are good! And no hbd or bf either? Can'ty understand that!! I'm going right to your AP homepage now. Love and Hugs, XXX Hugh.

  • Mari Goes gold member
    January 23, 2004
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    Oh shut! Sorry about that Hugh! I have changed it few times, I will do it again, you may come back to read the 'hidden' parts


  • simpliterature
    January 23, 2004
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    brilliant

    ...c")

    an old image of time perfectly pasted
    leak of the sand to its bottom wasted
    purposely alarms for beholder to know
    light moves too as shown by its shadow
    and when the gray sand flows no more
    glass unwinds set its top on the floor

    clear are your words artistic in phrase
    the flow and the mood easy to trace
    your cute reiteration of forming lines
    creation of thoughts eyeing good signs
    that this piece is worthy along the rest
    and your simple literature is at its best...

  • hugh wyles silver member
    January 23, 2004
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    Dear Mari,
    This is a VERY good piece of poetry but it is marred by the dark parts of the background and the colour of the text which disappears into it. At least my young 72 year-old eyes can't read it all. But the legible bits are damn good.
    Love and Hugs, XXX Hugh.
    Edited on Jan 23, 5:35 because ''.


  • bottleddreamz
    January 22, 2004
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    Wow Mari, very unique poetry style, glad to see your writing abilities growing and expanding. Awesome poem. It's very deep and has a high level of thought and intelligence. Great look on life and an hour glass...I may have to re-read this several times....just to fully understand the meaning. Well done!!

    Much Love,
    Jessie

  • Hugh Jorgan
    January 22, 2004
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    a very melodic peice of writing here.. soothing but there is a tranquility of sadness... id have to read it a few times over to soak in all its depth and now i must learn this form called Tiolet... pen on !!!


  • Deke
    January 22, 2004
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    Another great write Mari, I loved it.
    Damon D. Brewer

  • Mari Goes gold member
    January 22, 2004
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    Thanks for your correction dusduz! But lays I'm pretty sure that is correct. Ah an dthe rose, yes I saw it at the main page, but I keep forgetting it! Thanks again to show how to do it!
    Mari

  • dusduz
    January 22, 2004
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    ****

    Hey Mari, looking very good: I especially liked the last stanza, its flow, rhymes, choice of words and the pictures the lines paint, a beatiful sight. I have one little but, merely a typo basically , that is 'a hourglass', because of the h being soft in English it needs to be 'an hourglass' And I wasn't too sure about the form 'lays' in the lines : 'On this time counter
    Lays forgotten passages of history', but that's just a feeling I can't really explain...maybe someone else with more knowledge of Englsih could give it a try...it doesn't sound right in my head, which COULD mean it should be something, I could be wrong aswell
    I enjoyed it very much!
    Ooh one last thing: this was on the main page of AP and seems to give you your flower/rose back : 'The rose has changed to : f (no space), or, as always the shortcut *rose star works as well. '

  • tigeray
    January 22, 2004
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    Simply elegant. I just love this. Each stanza seems to build on the last. Really puts a new perspective on time. Great images too. I have not tried this form yet but I will definitely check it out!
    Take Care-Theresa

  • Mari Goes gold member
    January 22, 2004
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    Thank you! I did get help from John, to give it a good triolet form. I'm glad you liked it! Mari f (Before was easier to give aflower, now all what it shows is this and a f )


  • January 22, 2004
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    Priceless, Timeless

    Never fails the truth that does lie behind each of those grains.
    Never thought of it as a glass cell.
    Never would have wished to miss this prose.
    Never have i heard history contained in a simpl triolet.
    Never will I miss the oppertunity to congragulate you on this.


  • January 22, 2004
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    I kind of puts things in perspective doesn't it? When that sand drops down and you know time is running out it is a different feeling. I loved this Mari. Nice job! Irene

  • pruedence
    January 22, 2004
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    Even with each grain of sand...time flows like water till the end...taking different forms still moving forward...time is the only real thing we have...nice work, thanks for sharing

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