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- pre-winter -

Missing image

~*~

raking post-summer

children jump in brilliant hues

bronze maple, falls late

~*~

Author notes

A traditional western 5-7-5 Haiku

Subject: Autumn

Some things I will look for while judging:

I must recognize autumn in the 1st line.

No upper case at all.

Few if any filler words.

A set up and an aha moment. see http://allpoetry.com/assignment/show/109

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 5 of 5
  • piccola silver member
    September 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a beautiful haiku, but I'm looking for the aha moment or surprise. The leaf falling late isn't doing it for me somehow...I guess I want something less subtle; something that jumps out and says, "boo" lol. thank you for entering.


  • faithwhisperer silver member
    September 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Reminds me of my love for autumn and jumping in leaves, in just a few brief lines! Well done!


  • tomisb
    September 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is wonderful. I miss when my sone was small enough to hid like a pixie in the pile and leap and shriek when he saw me. The imagery and brevity breathtaking.
    Love, Tom B.

  • carole21
    September 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    a beautiful write . . well done as always . . liked "raking post-summer" and "children jump in brillant hues" . . good luck in the contest !!


  • poet2angels gold member
    September 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I love this!!!
    SO beautifully done, Bro

    You always leave one in awe...

    Lynda

1 - 5 of 5