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the number of times

just over two years,
and still my heart has not changed.
four guys,
two heartbreaks later,
i still find that i am connected,
attached to only you.
the thought of you,
to see you,
your soft smile upon your face-
all of it makes me weak at the knees.
and i dont the number of countless times,
the immense pain it has caused me,
to know the feelings you have toward me,
back will not fulfill.
and i dont think that you know,
the number of times you have haunted my dreams,
face and soul,
love and hate.
and i dont think that you know,
the number of times you have been that little reason
that i cry myself to sleep at night.
but you cannot know this,
because one of us has to be happy.

please tell me what you think

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