Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

1:01 Am


Autumn's chill
breathe through broken windows
while this morning's overcast
still obfuscate the moon,
leaving a view of darkness,
brightened only
by towering skyscrapers,
untouched by the mist.

Beneath cotton blanket,
cold toes tap sluggishly
to the voice of Timberlake,
while bored fingers fly across
the new HP Pavilion,
and the cup of cappuccino,
with cinnamon sprinkles,
is quickly drowned. 


Any grammar errors?

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

  • Cinnarry gold member
    October 6, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Loved your use of language. Thank you for entering my contest!