I dream awake
don’t dare to doze,
sleepwalking
through shadows
between dreams
caught in time’s current
inexorably unspooling
that last thread of hope in
this wreckage of life
where every welt’s a sunrise
every bruise a rainbow
each scar a living road map
to inside me places I can go
places I find myself
dreaming I could stay –
where there is no sunrise,
rainbow, or road map –
only yesterday’s girl:
the me I can no longer be
Author notes
Picture credit: "Yesterday's Girl" at http://evilxelf.deviantart.com/art/Yesterday-s-Girl-38650200
A contest entry
- May I Prompt You? by Manda Kathryn.
300 points, ended October 3, 2008, 26 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
-
This is deservant of the gold trophy! Well done!
This is a brilliant write full of fear, uncertainty, worthlessness and heartache.
This is a well thoughtout piece which filled my heart with ache and rememberance of my own times through a tragic life.
This piece brought tears to my eyes and an aching to my heart. Nobody deserves pain within there life when they DEFINITELY don't deserve it especially young children, but to me i oppose it at any age.
It just shows the reader that it doesn't matter if you move on with life it will still be with you and you can never get innocence or childhood back.
I am sorry that you had to go through this terrible experiences and i wish you happiness and love in the future.
Love, light and peace.
Stay safe
~Tara
-
What a gripping first line; I was so captivated by it I couldn't tear my eyes off the screen as I continued to read.
The ending is perfect but I found myself a little sad that it was over
♥
Thank You & Best of Luck
Stay safe
~Manda
-
Beautifully written.
Well.... you just kicked my butt on this one! I love this entry! The last two lines were perfectly stated and summed the whole contest up!
I love this
"where every whelt's a sunrise" -
something about that was shockingly unique and inspiring.
You are, as always, most talented and creative.
-
This is not a place I willingly visit in my head, but honestly now that I think about it, isn't NOT thinking about something still THINKING about it?
I would think so, lol.
AS far as this read, yeah, this is what you feel, for the three seconds it takes to run across that empty room, and shut that door really hard. You did become this poor girl, and all of our experiences are different, that's what makes us unique-but one thing- most survivors of abuse don't willingly visit that place, and do everything, including self medication, to forget about it all. Out of the problem, into the solution sort of thing. Years of self denial, refusal of acceptance, and refusal to deal with it head on was and is a survival tool. The one thing that helped me, was thinking up ways to get him back, swearing revenge...it kept me alive at least. But ultimate forgiveness did have to come, even as painful as it was to go back to this place. And in the end, I did realize it wasn't my fault, I was just a little girl, and he had no right, period. Forgiveness doesn't always necessarily mean not being justifiably angry.
Okay, whew, sorry.
Another novel, this conversation will probably continue, lol.
Good luck in this contest,
blessings always,
jin
Disclaimer:
I am not the therapist though, and so I can only always speak for myself, and my life.
-
This one touched me. As a social worker I've seen and heard and felt stories like these so many times and still it moves mountains within me. You've captured the essence of abuse here...the broken circles, the lost childhood. Wonderful poetry, Garrison.
~ Nicolette
-
You write endopathic ...
and become the girl in her agony.
Carefully mapped out, the roads lead to the end of the rainbow, were there is no pot of gold, but loss.
Metaphoric brilliance.
Love
Myra
-
Yesterday's girl.... stunning write. Moving!!
"caught in time’s current
inexorably unspooling
that last thread of hope in
this wreckage of life"
awesome!!
And a fantastic ending!
"only yesterday’s girl:
the me I can no longer be"
You did it again! Bravo!!
Adding your comment:
1 - 7 of 7
