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Darwins Chair

A myriad of tiny twinkling stars besets the distant milky way,
across the moonlit heavens stretching in boundless neat array.
Many thoughts one ponders and sorely seeks to understand,
should I feel as insignificant as the proverbial grain of sand. ?
.
But to me in my own heavens ,and celestial milky way,
encompassed  in my lucid mind  just a thought away.
I can switch my mental channel to happiness and joy,
nullify all negative thoughts that serve just to annoy.

There are many solar adventures and jaunts of every kind,
stored away inside the files of my preconscious mind.
Like an accommodation advert my mind is self contained,
how do so many fleeting avid thoughts find room to be retained.

In my thoughts I can accomplish what money cannot buy,
sometimes as I dissect all my thoughts whilst looking up on high.
I wonder if those wonders I see nightly in the sky.,
were all  there just by accident, including you or I..

So I contacted  the Afterlife, Darwin  was still about,
he answered in a whisper,said” there’s no need to shout.
Don’t tell those two gorillas, sitting, in the corner over there,
they’d laugh their heads off, if they knew why, I’m in this dunces chair."

Author notes

j u d m c

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 68 of 68

  • T.o.r.t.u.r.e. gold member
    September 20
    Edit | Reply
    thats alot of trophies on this piece. thank you for entering and good lucl in the contest i hope to see you in the next round

  • Macsword
    September 4

    Edit | Reply

    Lots of trophies...

    attest to the write's appeal. It brought me a smile today. I am reading from the Contest "Anything". Congrats on the HM there, and for all the other contests...well
    good fortune.


  • Antebellum
    September 4

    Edit | Reply
    But to me in my own heavens ,and celestial milky way,
    encompassed in my lucid mind just a thought away.
    I can switch my mental channel to happiness and joy,
    nullify all negative thoughts that serve just to annoy.


    wow.
    this entire part was my favorite.
    stunning write.

    I like the little humor at the end.
    thanks for entering,
    good luck


  • LullabyOfADeadMan
    September 1

    Edit | Reply
    great write! No questions asked. Thank you so much for the write! And please forgive me for having not judged this contest yet!

    ~~Tay.


  • Pisces Pieces
    August 27

    Edit | Reply
    This is awesome, I love the rhythm and rhyme and it really makes you read slowly and think about what you are saying. I loved the concept of In my thoughts I can accomplish what money cannot buy'...

  • this is quite the write... loved it ... thank you for entering:]


  • My Chronos gold member
    August 18

    Edit | Reply
    I added you to my favorites because I liked the way you wrote. We are in this contest together, I wrote "Withered Roses"... I was just reading all the poems. I enjoyed reading this. I hope you didn't mind me adding you.

  • division
    August 18

    Edit | Reply
    I liked the imagery throughout this poem and the slight humor at the end. I thought this was good and something I haven't read before! I'm not completely sold, but I'm going to give you a yes, because I think if I give you a prompt that can really stretch your mind, you would do really great. congratulations


  • HaleyMary
    August 17

    Edit | Reply
    This was awesome. I liked the part of lucid the best. I find stuff like lucid dreaming fascinating Sometimes I think the most amazing things in life and the journeys we go on can all be accomplished by the creativity of our minds. Thanks for sharing and congrats on all those trophies. Best of luck with the other contests.

    • judmc
      August 18
      Edit | Reply

      HaleyMary

      Many Thanks for your kind comments on "Darwins Chair" Haley so glad you liked it
      ....Best Wishes.....George...


  • Little Lesley
    August 16

    Edit | Reply
    Awesome! I like imagery! I congratulate with your trophies - you deserve them!
    Wish you the best of luck!
    ♥~Little Lesley~♥


  • No Quarter
    July 30

    Edit | Reply
    awesome write, flow, rhythm, rhyme, imagery, language, everything was perfect.
    my favorite lines:
    "Many thoughts one ponders and sorely seeks to understand,
    should I feel as insignificant as the proverbial grain of sand. ?"
    and
    "But to me in my own heavens ,and celestial milky way,
    encompassed in my lucid mind just a thought away."
    thanks for entering and good luck

  • Great humor at the end to bring us back to our reality.
    The flow and verbage was great - could really get caught up in your universal web.
    Good Luck in the contest
    Tang


  • Jeremy0826 silver member
    July 20

    Edit | Reply
    Well done and congratulations to you on all of your
    trophies for this one! I love the thought that you
    put into this write. Good luck to you with it here!





    Jeremy0826

    • judmc
      July 21
      Edit | Reply

      Jeremy0826

      Many thanks for your kind comments on "Darwin's Chair" and
      "Gypsy Rose",glad you liked them Best Wishes...George...

  • The rhyme and rhythm flow really quite well. It's a bit jarring to go from such ethereal language down to a more earthly, less effusive tone.

    Overall, a quite nice write, and an evident talent.

    Sincerely,

    ~ ~ Janet ~ ~


  • cybilseyes silver member
    July 5
    Edit | Reply
    So witty tiny little bites along the way. Wonderful piece thanks for your entry!
    xo
    Cyb

  • very clever! All the way through I was trying to figure out why it is titled Darwin's Chair! I really like the questions in this poem, a very enjoyable read. Thank you very much for entering it.

  • Wow

    The rhyming and flow of this poem were ingenius! I loved this poem, and you wrote it so well, bravo good chap bravo, Thanks for entering


  • shiratikva
    June 19

    Edit | Reply
    Good poem. It was a pleasure to read.
    These are my favorite lines:
    "But to me in my own heavens ,and celestial milky way,
    encompassed in my lucid mind just a thought away".
    Well done!!!
    Thank you for entering, good luck!

    • judmc
      June 20
      Edit | Reply

      shiratikva

      Many Thanks for your kind comments on "Darwins chair" so glad you like it Best Wishes....George....


  • Heva Feva
    June 14
    Edit | Reply
    Very cute! I loved the ending

    So I contacted the Afterlife, Darwin was still about,
    he answered in a whisper,said” there’s no need to shout.
    Don’t tell those two gorillas, sitting, in the corner over there,
    they’d laugh their heads off, if they knew why, I’m in this dunces chair."

    Amazing! Good luck and thanks for entering my contest.
    -heva

  • nicely structured with good techniques, alliteration and strong language used, thanks for entering. Also, rather humourus

  • i must be thick, cuz i dont get the ending...
    but i love the flow it fits so well
    thanks for entering

    • judmc
      June 7
      Edit | Reply

      MelissahhMidnite

      Many Thanks for your kind comments on Darwin's Chair.
      the very fact that Darwin the "Father" of Evolutionary theory was in heaven proves "Creationism" and he didn't want the gorrilas from whom we all were supposed to be descended from to know he was wrong and that's why he was in the "dunce's chair" simple really?... George
      P.S. Glad you liked my "Little Girl" Thanks ! !

    • judmc
      June 7
      Edit | Reply

      Melissahh

  • Wow... this was absolutely beautiful; I can see why it's won so many trophies!!
    Thankyou so much for entering, and I wish you the best of luck in the contest

    Maria

  • THIS WAS AMAZING! I really enjoyed reading this. Great clear message and the flow was on point! I really would like it if you would send me the message I ask for in the rules! Thank you for entering and good luck!

  • You have a bunch of punctuation errors. If you read this over, you'll see what I mean. It's not a big deal though because this flowed well. You had some great imagery.

    Well done. Congratulations on the gold.

  • You have penned an amazing piece here I cannot choose a favourite part the entire thing just rocks
    Thankyou for your entry

  • Sounds good.

  • This is an excellent poem, I appreciate you entering my contest and I do wish you the best of luck. I am unaware of who you are which is perfectly fine with me but I was wondering in your AN if you can please put what part of my family you would like to be a part of?
    thank you .
    Damien-

  • I really enjoyed this. The way that it shows how wondrous the confines of our own minds can be. The questioning in the early section, the fullness of the answer to that question. I really enjoy some of the wordplay, would question the use of "advert" and it should be "dunce's". One other thing on a personal note, those who feel that Darwin should be in that "chair" usually don't believe in being able to contact the afterlife.
    A fun write, not a vision of darkness but fun none the less.
    Peace


  • billpoet silver member
    January 8

    Edit | Reply

    Hi judmc

    fine poem here - I'm hoping my my "thinker" doesn't evolve into mush - yours certainly hasn't - Tough you might enjoy reading this poem: http://allpoetry.com/poem/3239956 I;ll be reading yours - best wishes on this new orbit billpoet

    • judmc
      January 8
      Edit | Reply

      billpoet

      Many Thanks for your kind comments on "Darwin's chair" Bill I read your
      "Thoughts" poem it's quite a profound and meaningful write I had to read it twice to let it sink in,must have taken a while to compose
      Check out my "The Palefaces" see what you think.. George


  • echo-ink
    January 5
    Edit | Reply
    Awesome, I think I've read this before.
    Thanks for entering.

    AHH, yes, I already gave you Gold, remember???
    It's still perfect and I still love it.


  • Plastic Dreams
    December 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    it seems you've done a great job of falling into my spacious catergory of concluding your personal being and as to exactly where that is you've been.
    i enjoyed this write greatly and thank you for the submission


  • stella187
    December 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I read it again and still think it's brillliant. The first and the last verses are my favourites but I love it all. I think it should have won the contest.

    Jenny


  • stella187
    December 13, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    This is brilliant.


  • ASmileForYou
    December 10, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Ok, this is fantastic.


  • susiebc
    November 29, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Exudes the power in KNOWING while basking in glory of living in the mystery!
    Loved it!


  • Rhythm Child
    November 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A great entry ( you must think it is to have entered it in so many contests lol )
    thanks for taking part, wishing you luck would be an insult to your talent so take care

    message me for anything
    Billy (Rhythm Child)


  • Bean Sidhe silver member
    November 11, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Hmmm...well, at first glance, to be perfectly honest, I thought "Ugh, rhyme." But it works well in this piece even if I am personally not a fan. Also, it tends to be a touch long for my personal preferences but nonetheless, it is a quality piece of work & I appreciate your entry. Good luck


  • innocence jaded.xx
    November 3, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Well written. I liked this. Clever :]

    -There are many solar adventures and jaunts of every kind,
    stored away inside the files of my preconcious mind.
    ...

    I love how you wrote that. It was simply brilliant and blew me away. Thanks for entering & good luck <3


  • FAH faithandhope
    November 2, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Very very clever. I loved it!


  • TabbyCat
    November 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is what I was looking for...a witty, clever ending that instantly clarifies your message. Loved it.

    There were a few places with punctuation errors, but a quick proofread should resolve that problem.


  • BleedingBlackTears
    October 28, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I LOVE IT this my favourite perception option so far there are a few gramatical errors however: You cant put a ., together. if you are going to do a .. it should be three or more ..... so we know its not an accident. your speech areas have the " in the wrong place or facing the wrong way. nice work very well written good luck


  • storiesuntold gold member
    October 26, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Cute write here

    This s written very well with such a cute story


  • Forgotten Anomaly
    October 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    That was very origional. I've been learning about darwanian evolution which only made this more interesting. A fun read. Thank you for entering my contest.


  • trekkergirl
    October 23, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Oh now this is sooo good. I can see why Darwin would be wearing a dunces cap in heaven. Yup I sure can. This is so very well written and I really do think that the last part especially is very cute and even funny. You have an excellent write here. Thanks for joining in my contest.

    • judmc
      October 23, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      ERbby

      Many Thanks for your kind comments on "Darwin's Chair" glad you liked
      it Best Wishes George

    • judmc
      October 23, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      KyleBerg

      Many Thanks for your kind comments on "Jehovah's Nightmare" very much
      appreciated glad you liked it Best Wishes and Kindest Regards George

    • judmc
      October 23, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      trekkergirl

      Many Thanks for your kind comments on "Darwin's Chair" very much appreciated glad you liked it.Best Wishes and Kindest Regards George


  • endless-lover silver member
    October 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    flow-imagery-lineing of the poem it was all to great my dear

    thanks much for entering and i wish you all the best in the contest and the others as well take care and love much,


    vanna


  • Fallen Grace silver member
    October 21, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    This is very entertaining, I really enjoyed your work here. I love the imagery in the first few lines, it helps set the mood and it's beautifully done.
    Possibly, could you tell me which picture you used, just so I know for sure?
    Excellent poem, a job well done! Good luck in the contest!


    -Kaela

    • judmc
      October 23, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      Angel of Dreams

      Many Thanks for your kind comments on "Darwin's Chair" glag you enjoyed it Best Wishes and Kindest Regards George.


  • Olivias Violin
    October 18, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Clever


  • Xx Luna xX
    October 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Well done

    A miriad of tiny twinkling stars besets the distant milky way,
    across the moonlit heavens stretching in boundless neat array.
    I love these lines! Thank you for entering!

  • echo-ink
    October 5, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Aha! YESSA! YESSA! YESSA! I loved this beyond love!
    Straight to the top, I think you are indeed a family, friend ??? If not, your are now,
    Bell,

    • judmc
      October 5, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      PoeticLove

      Many Thanks for your kind comments on "Darwin's Chair" so glad you liked it and so glad you regard me as a friend.Best Wishes and Kindest Regards George ++++


  • whispernthedark Greeters member
    October 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is great, I love that last line. Thank you for entering the contest, good luck.


    whisper


  • Titus gold member
    October 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    lovely story, and very worthy of publication. I hope you have many worthy of this denote, and by, 'pre-write', have many more favourites for option. enjoyable read.

    • judmc
      October 5, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      ElegantlyDangerous

      Many Thanks for your kind comments on "Her Smile" so glad you enjoyed it.Best Wishes George ++++

    • judmc
      October 5, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      Titus

      Many Thanks for your kind comments on "Darwin's Chair" so glad you enjoyed it and that you deem it worthy of publication.I have written
      about 150 poems on A.P since last Christmas and have made a couple
      of attempts to get some published but I got deterred by the complicated procedures involved on these sites,so I gave up trying.
      Best Wishes and Kindest Regards George !!


  • SmokinHotWhiteTiger
    October 2, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Thank You 4 Entering our Contest Project Un-Cliche

    Hello there I am a judge for the contest mentioned above and any ways I really like this poem. it aa triffle too long for my taste BUT then again the length is not the problem nor is there any problem at all because it all comes together very nicely. any ways very nice flow and depth and with a very interesting subjection for the poem. any ways keep up the good work good luck in the contest(s)


  • Flowergirl
    September 28, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    wow very nice i loved it keep up the great work and best of luck...

1 - 68 of 68