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Welshday: The Kursk

Old Rimbaud said, “Let’s go and take a glass

of whiskey in a jostling pub I know.”

I, like a sodding numpty, dogged his steps,

And tracked him to a clapped-out, frowsy dive,

Where half the clientele were missing ears –

the other half were shouting to be heard!

 

We’d been there half an hour when I heard

a Russian sailor tap the falling glass;

he grabbed my sleeve, said “This is for your ears

alone, no other bugger has to know.

I heard my skipper calling dive-dive-dive,

as I slid down the conning-tower steps…”

 

Old Rimbaud, blootered, sunk down on the steps;

the Russian bellowed at me, to be heard.

“The air inside gets hotter when you dive,

the sea is slagged and dark as bottle-glass.

The ghost of every bugger that you know

floats by, and there’s a pounding in your ears!”

 

His sliding, slootered accent hurt my ears.

I thumbed my belt and slipped some salsa steps;

I said, “Now tell me something I don’t know,

no half-arsed, half-cocked tale already heard,

no shite enigma darkly in a glass,

no bonny buck-and-wing, no duck-and-dive!”

 

He scowled at me and, miming a crash-dive,

resumed the tale that battered at my ears,

while I, to ease my pain, sucked at my glass.

“Kolesnikov took all the proper steps,

and we went aft – perhaps you might have heard –

but when you’re frigging shark-bait, boy, you know!”

 

I shut him up, and said, “Here’s what I know –

no fucker made it home from that last dive –

They all asphyxiated, so I heard!”

He laughed, he jeered, I stopped my ringing ears,

and sat down with old Rimbaud on the steps,

to spit at all the demons in my glass.

 

When ghosts well from a glass you always know,

You’re sitting on the steps of some sad dive,

and though you stop your ears you’ll still have heard!

 

 

Author notes

Welshday is a project I have in mind to spend a day in the poetic company of a fictionalised Irvine Welsh (in real life, a renowned Scottish author) and his journey-companion Detective Inspector Rimbaud. Quite where it will all lead I do not yet know.

(Why is this unique? Well, it's the only sestina I have ever written, and I think it's a pretty good modern example.)

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 27 of 27

  • Dark Otter
    January 11

    Edit | Reply

    This graces my contest!

    I, once again, get to see why I consider you the best poet on the site. It will be worth multiples reads just to learn the form and the nuances of speech that you have used. Believable dialogue and story in a form that I'm sure was a migraine to conceive. Kudos, my friend, for this signature masterpiece. Thank you for entering!


    • Mairi bheag gold member
      January 11
      Edit | Reply
      I think I ought to check with Irvine Welsh that he doesn't mind my doing this, before I go any further!


  • Danny Beatty gold member
    December 26, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I love the 'down' of lines 12 and l3.

    I love 'his sliding, slootered accent hurt my ears'

    I love this brilliant sestina.

    Amera's comment's same as mine.

    • Mairi bheag gold member
      December 26, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      "Slootered" is a wonderful Scots word (appropriate, because this poem is set in Edinburgh) which literally refers to food or drink spilt or dribbled down the front of one's shirt. Glad you like it.

  • SueRee
    September 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Challenging

    Connecting poems into a coherent story - or writing out the plot in poetry- either way, it's a fantastic way to tell your story. Your "frowsy dive" scene could be echoed in a number of social occasions from reunions to family holidays, each with their ghosts and tales "you'll still have heard". This stands alone as well - excellent write!


    • Mairi bheag gold member
      September 24, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you. the "stand alone" was what I was aiming for here.


  • Paloszoo gold member
    September 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Brilliant

    I wouldn't dare attempt this form, but you've done it and with such style! I thoroughly enjoyed it! It's no wonder you received a gold! Well worth it in my eyes, though I'm certainly no expert ;-)


  • MissyMouse
    September 24, 2008

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    A migraine makes work like that? Damn girl, what happens when you don't have one? Beautiful write.


  • Cynthia Gaines gold member
    September 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Brilliant!!!

    Congratulations on the golden chalice!!! Peace, Cyn


  • Wandering Woodchuck silver member
    September 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Nicely done. I can see why you were received the gold cup for this. Great job.

    Mike

  • chordphrute
    September 18, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I'm agreeing with Sir Jeff here... I have my favorites of yours, but this one's bloody brilliant.

    • Mairi bheag gold member
      September 18, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Oh please don't knight the beggar or we'll never hear the last of it!

      Thank you, darling. It grew out of a migraine and a busy week.

      ♥♥♥♥
      M

  • GreySquirrel
    September 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    It's the sheer intelligence of your writing, whatever the poetic challenge you choose to tackle that makes you such a joy to read and an inspiration to follow.


    • Mairi bheag gold member
      September 18, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for the compliment, GS - left me speechless.


  • Amera gold member
    September 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is really good, good as in world class good. I’m the Sestina teacher here on AP so this is one form I think I’m qualified to comment on. First of all you have composed a captivating story with dialog thoughts and imagery. The poem flows like magic which is very difficult to do with a Sestina. Most Sestinas sound forced because of the end word restrictions for placement. So few poets can compose a Sestina and very few can compose a good one. I’ve never seen you write like this before, needless to say, I’m impressed.

    Love,
    Amera♥


    • Mairi bheag gold member
      September 18, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      What can I say, Sis, except thank you. No one has a better appreciation of form than you.

  • Yvette Champ gold member
    September 18, 2008

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    Excellent

    Lovely usage of language, you have this intrinsic ability to give life to your characters, movement to the moments and birth to poetry that dances. Have you considered adding audio to this?

    • Mairi bheag gold member
      September 18, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      I have considered Ken Stott for the role of D I Rankin, and Bill Paterson for the Chorus (not in this particular piece)... I have considered offering it to the BBC when it is finished!

      • Yvette Champ gold member
        September 18, 2008
        Edit | Reply
        I wish you luck with that. It would be neat if they could find a similar vehicle for creativity similar to "Talking Heads"


  • cricketjeff gold member
    September 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    I am not going to pretend I think this is your greatest poem, but it is a bloody brilliant Sestina

    NB3

    • Mairi bheag gold member
      September 18, 2008

      Edit | Reply
      I think that's probably a compliment.

      I am envisioning this as an interlude in a longer work (I am thinking of interrupting it with various snips and snaps of poetry).

1 - 27 of 27