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It ain't gonna change. (freewrite)

It ain’t gonna change
Is it?
I’ve accepted that
Though I’ll miss it

We were always both there
Weren’t we?
But now it’s just me
Who remembers it

Everything has to be said by me
Doesn’t it?
You don’t think to ask
Don’t you miss it?

You tell me “nothing’s changed”
Hasn’t it?
Maybe it’s because
You’ve forgotten it

It would be easier
Wouldn’t it?
If you just accepted it
That you don’t care

It ain’t gonna change
Is it?
Please don’t lie to me
Just admit it.

Author notes

(by Starblaze - note for contest rules: 2 entries in contest 'forget me' and 'it ain't gonna change')

This one is a freewrite for the 'make me feel' competition, its about lonliness and loss / frustration. I've written more hopeful poems but this one relates more to how i'm feeling lately. Hope you like it

A contest entry

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Comments


  • Trisha W
    November 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    amazing write

    awsooome write!! i loved it! i can totally relate to this and it's hard when you finally realize that you're the only one who feels something that ain't there with both of you...and it is too hard to forget and let go of something like that...thanks for sharing..hope to read more poems by u!!


  • Asylaarix
    October 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    VERY THOUGHT PROVOKING

    That's what this is.
    You ask the same questions
    man of us ask not only partners,
    but to ourselves!
    How many times can those questions
    be answered?
    And in how many ways?
    It's very thought provoking
    and although it probably wasn't meant to be.
    It's an amazing write
    and the pieces just fall together beautifully.
    I do agree that "ain't" probably shouldn't go in there,
    but I understand, that it really doesn't matter
    A piece is a piece when it's your own.
    If you feel it belongs there, then I agree.
    You put it there for a reason,
    so therefore, it belongs.
    Very beautiful piece.

    Much Luv & Respect!
    TT


  • lowercase prelude gold member
    October 5, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I think "ain't" shouldn't be used, however I like how you constructed this. It's somewhat vague, it doesn't give out a lot of detail, but it makes you think, makes you wonder.

    I like it.

    • Ivory Rose
      October 27, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      I disagree. I think that "ain't" is very fitting for this poem. I enjoyed reading this.