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Walk In the Park



It was quiet in the park this evening.
No one but she and I
loitered in the oncomming darkness,
and we were both well aware.

She came to me
through the thickening night
beneath the stars of dusk
large, almond, amber eyes
hotly pierced my icy soul.

I watched as she walked
most appealingly
in my direction,
slow and deliberate,
eyes trained on mine.

She came close enough to lick
nose to nose
placed a hand on the back of my head
tilted her own
and kissed me
with such ferocious passion
I could not resist
and returned the favour
with haste.

My hand ran up her back
as she gently pulled away
those beautiful eyes searching my own
desperate
wanting to believe
that it was I for whom she searched.

I could not answer the silent question,
only took her hand,
lead her to a shaded corner,
lay her upon the autumn leaves
littering the earth.

I gently kissed her neck
her shoulders
her breastplate,
moving to her breasts...

She smiled,
beautiful, full lips
set in a stunning face
to me
framing an emotion
of calm delight.

I moved to her stomach
kissing her belly button,
watching her reaction
as she watched my actions
smiling and caressing my hair.

I made my way to her legs
passed her base, onto her thighs
lifted her silky, summery black dress
far to skimpy for this cold night.

I kissed down to her knees
her shin,
and she pressed a hand to her heart
giggling in delight.

She wore boots up to here
so I was forced to stop,
and instead worked my way back up...

...we made love right there
right then
fighting mosquitoes
and clutching each other for dear life,
in need of this love
this contact
this specific moment
so special to us both...

We moved as one
until well after nightfall
watching each others faces
creating such powerful ecstasy...

When it was over,
we lay naked against
the grass and dead foliage
her arm lain over my chest,
mine beneath her shoulders,
curled into me
she whispered

Thankyou...


She left without another word
and I realised
this was the kind of encounter she was accustomed to
this was the sort of relationship she
had always had with men.

I watched her go,
wanting to call her back
but knowing her complications
were too great even for
me.

As her silhouette mingled with the darkness
I let thoughts of her take me home
and accompany me
to this very
day.





Author notes


Hmmm... too long? What do you think?

In a list

A contest entry

Honest Critique - How Do You Like My Soul?

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Comments

1 - 7 of 7

  • Iridessa MoonFlower
    October 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I thought this was good. Looking in on it at a man looking in on it I once again have to agree. Damn! ~~Iridessa~~


  • Riftkin gold member
    September 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for entering
    and best wishes in my contest.

    rereading all to pick my favorites.

    Riftkin


  • Lost Vampyre Angel
    September 17, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    ooh wow! very very hot, and sensual, rather dirty too with the hint at the prostitute and the boots. and the ending was sad. but this was so beautiful and sensual. you are an amazing sensual writer! all my love! <3 you
    your vampy xxxx


  • LadyDementia gold member
    September 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow! I'd say this was quite the sensual piece hunni! I do like how you've approached the telling of it. It's a very tender and touching piece, the emotions are superbly portrayed. The ending is quite sad, bring reality back with a bump The boots bit gets me, sort of feels out of place. Maybe something more like, 'boots set my lips into reverse' if you must mention them IMO it could be omitted all together. I don't write this theme as a rule so forgive the poor example, hopefully you know what I mean. Other than that it reads beautifully to me Good luck in the contest


    • VoltaicHypnosis gold member
      September 16, 2008

      Edit | Reply
      That was a fabulous critique. The boots are the only hint that she's actually a prostitute... maybe I will rework it


      • LadyDementia gold member
        September 16, 2008
        Edit | Reply
        Figured they were there for a reason Just sounded a little awkward there to me is all


  • VoltaicHypnosis gold member
    September 16, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    This is what I call a novel! Tut tut...

1 - 7 of 7