unequivical.
I. you know those words?
the ones that curl;
and choke between bits of nicoteen in your teeth &
hide within bacteria.
captivating every sentence
that flows from your mouth like froth from beer,
to my heart.
II. I wasnt born normal anyway;
I was, pink fingernails & dirty palms.
you just chose the defected toy
on the assembly line.
that will never stop loving you.
Author notes
I tried my best!
I would've entered sooner but I was desperatly trying to find a poem you hadn't commented!
havent writen anything in ages.
Best of luck judging.x
Flutterby--x
In a list
A contest entry
- For my favorites and those that have me on their favorites by whiterabbit..
400 points, ended December 11, 2008, 23 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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Very well penned here
Bravo on this one I found it a very interesting read indeed
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woah, I really really like this.
where have you been hiding? xD
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oh oh oh, very thoughtful and idk, metaphorical...
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Interesting
It felt like I was ease dropping
in on your most intimate thoughts.
At a quiet moment of reflection.
The last three lines is the killer.
love your style
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Amazing Poem
Stunning imagery in this very heartfelt poem. A strong message of love that never seems to end even when it is over. Take care, Sandy
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i love the first part.
'you know those words?
the ones that curl;'
---
that's so amazing. 'the ones that curl' i've never seen words described like that. i love it. it has such a bitter tone to it. i loooove it.
i just realized i already commented on this a couple months ago haha
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Its so pretty! Again, your imagery is amazing!
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aww, really like this a ton.
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wow, this is beautiful.
your imagery is amazing.
I. is my favourite part
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This was very cool.
"you just chose the defected toy
on the assembly line.
that will never stop loving you."
This stuck because in that small amount, it really (to me) showed how true of a person you are. Very well done
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your prettttttty amazing.
"unequivical.
I. you know those words?
the ones that curl;
and choke between bits of nicoteen in your teeth &
hide within bacteria. "
-
Powerful, sweetie... I'm really feeling your words ... more than I want to admit.
Good luck, hunni
-Z
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I'm sorry I didn't comment this sooner princess, I've just been busy. Anyways, I absolutely love this. You are so talented and I'm happy that you're writing more. I love the way you write. The words, descriptions, and details that you use are just perfect. There's so much power and emotion in your words. I can feel the emotions here and I feel like I can really relate to this. Brilliant job bby. love you
♥
x
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my love you are still amazing :]
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Deep. Passionate. Flowing. Flawless.
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it's so real and harsh...... ahh sensual butterfly stole my word!! lol anyways, it really brings a real-world perspective on things, some ppl don't go for that but i like it! great write
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very creative and harsh! Great write though
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"I. you know those words?
the ones that curl;
and choke between bits of nicoteen in your teeth &
hide within bacteria. "
That was my favorite part :]
Good luck in the contest dear;
I hope you win :]
Actually you better.
Or else.
<33
-Mary -
Excellent
A rather unusual write. You've expressed yourself quite well indeed. Thanks for sharing this one with us. -
Wow...
this is very creative...
I really like it.
I think it is like other poems, but it is also really different.
Adding your comment:
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