...enough all of this...
,all of this,
< P >
< A >
< I >
< N >
...i don't need more affection...
^don't fake me^
...i don't need more love...
^coz i'm sick of it^
==all i want==
-ISH-
{~D/I/E~}
Author notes
it's my first DP poem...
i know it's not good one...
but i'm learning...
pls, for my first DP poem..
comment me...
- A Dirty Pretty Group group list • next in list
A contest entry
- WHiTE [[trash]] BEAUTiFUL by DRUNKENxXxBABiiD0LL.
900 points, ended November 23, 2008, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - E.M.O ~ PoEmS xxx && brokenrosessooooofocate by Ryno.
400 points, ended December 8, 2008, 36 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
pls, suggest and comment...:)
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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for your first this is amazing... no matter what this is amazing. great write.
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I know how this feels honey, Iv'e felt suicidal and lost because I'm so tired of being loved, then not loved, then loved. Nicely done.
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thank you...
XD
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I honestly don't think the emotion was strong enough. Because I don't know very much about Dirty Pretty - I am not really qualified to judge it - but I would say that you don't want to just focus on the overuse of punctuation, or, if you do, don't let it take the readers focus from the emotion - emotion is key, even in dirty pretty I feel.
And, also, although Dirty Pretty alllows some cliche, don't get too carried away. But that is just my personal opinion. -
Not Bad
I like that it was short and to the point. A little too much punctuation though. In dirty pretty you don't have to put punctutation everywhere. Putting it on key things or like ♥heart♥ or $MONEY$, *Stars* whatever. Anyways it wasn't bad, thanks for entering! -
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okay..
thank you~♥
i'll try my best..
X3 -
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No problem!
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wow!! lots of emotion in this piece.
great write!!
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:3 thank you...
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i like it, its really good go you i like the diffierent parts of this
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This is cool. You did a good job in using the symbols. Great write hun =]
~love lae xo
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awww,thank you...^^
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...DP? Dirrty Pretty?
Uhm...It seems more like Glitter to me. Glitter is basically using symbols such as <>;"{[*~- etc etc to emphasize the point of the poem.
It's simple, but not bad.
~S~
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awww,thanks...
pls teach me the different about dirty preety and glitter...
thank you..^^
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