after all the cuts and bruises were all gone.
I no longer look like a victim
by your hand.
As I stand before you
my heart pounding in my ears
I see you as I have never before.
Where I had expected to see this monster
seven feet tall
with arms as big as houses
and a soul as black as coal.
What I truly see is this pitiful old man.
A man who knows he is now close to death
and is looking for redemption.
A redemption he is sure he'll never have.
You see after all those years of your cruelty
and abuse I too have been searching...
searching for a reason.
To know why it was me
you choose to hurt and not another.
Was I special in some way?
Was I too weak to fight
or to simple to understand
that what you did to me
was my fault not yours.
Or was it simply that I was there
an easy prey
for a man who was sick.
Whatever the reason might have been
I don't know if I can give you the gift
you are looking for
a gift of forgiveness.
I cannot give you absolution.
You were suppose to love me.
To protect me from all the evils of the world.
You weren't suppose to be one.
Author notes
Dunno what to say about this one. Only it brought back a lot of memories...
This is #2
In a list
- My poems • next in list
- honorable mentions trophies • next in list
- trophy winners of mine • next in list
A contest entry
- Prewrites. by She Stole My Voice.
300 points, ended September 21, 2008, 57 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - CONTEST: This should've won something by now!! (PIF) by Paloszoo.
525 points, ended September 17, 2008, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - inspire me........how far have you come? by doesne1care.
465 points, ended October 24, 2008, 28 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pre-Write Appreciation Day 2008 by Kimojuno.
1447 points, ended October 8, 2008, 40 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Leave out all of the Rest by MYsecondchance.
375 points, ended October 18, 2008, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ABUSE - looking for poems to be published :) by DramaQueen469.
550 points, ended October 25, 2008, 58 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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Wow... it must've took a lot of strength to write this poem as it is to your abuser. I know it was very difficult for me to write something similar so I admire your courage in writing this.
It is awful having so many questions and not being able to get the answers... or at least the answers you're looking for. And if you get them you realise they're not good enough anyway.
Great write
x x x

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Before I comment on your write, I first want to say that I am so deeply sorry that you had this experience in any shape or form.
Very well written emotional piece from title to the very last word. Thank you for sharing.

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Wow.
This is so powerful, and amazing... I am so impressed, and I can relate. WELL DONE, this piece is full of emotion and is just so well-crafted and amazing.
What name would you like this published under? Feel free to IM it to me if you like, just make sure you include the title of this poem!
Thankyou for entering,
~*~DramaQueen469~*~ -
i felt like the first poem was the first part of a story and this one was the conclusion.
thanx very much for entering both poems -
You truly wrote your emotions ...
and that is self-therapy. This is to NAME the abuse. Forgiveness can only come if you put the BLAME where it should be: the abuser. THEN you may SHAME darkness, by turning your back on the ACT and forgive the PERSON. Hate the act, but forgive the person FINALLY ... and this cannot be forced ... It shall come from a deep well of suffering, healing and finally to get perspective on who you are: an innocent soul, robbed of the very life of happiness, but now able to get up, heal and ... forgive! If you set HIM free, by forgiving him, you take away all the control that he ever had over you.
May you be victorious in all of these steps of the process. I know you can!
Love
Myra

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wow, very powerfull indeed
firstly; it was not your fault, you did not deserve it, no one deserves to be treated like that. he is his own person and he has to tae control of his actions.
really powerfull poem, really could see you pain.
if you ever want to talk, you can, and well done for being able to share this poem with us.
thanyou xx -
I am getting the feeling that the person is your father, and if that is the case then wow. No matter what, no one has the right to do that. It is even worse when it is your own parent, however the roll of father is a position of protection-not hurt. I am truly sorry that this happened.
Jeff -
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actually it did not happen quite this way. And no not a father try grandfather. And even tho he is dead now... I will never forgive him.
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I liked this... To bad you went and spammed it into every other contest, now im DQing.
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To be honest I did not expect to be recognized
after all the cuts and bruises were all gone.
I no longer look like a victim
by your hand.
This seems like personal growth to me. I don't know. The whole poem was beautifully done with its heartfelt honesty and sad imagery. Thanks for entering my contest. I'm honored to have you share your work here. Good luck! -
There are some punctuation errors,
but other than that
it's a great piece.
Thank you for entering and good luck ♥
-Rainbow. -
Such a sad piece, full of painful emotions wrought upon a victim of abuse. Glad to read it wasn't totally based on your life, still quite powerful in the way you have expressed this sad poem. I wish you the best of luck in the contest, take care.
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Thank you for your comment. It is a very emotional subject for me.
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So sad
This is a powerfull poem so full of emotions and pain, yet it is so well written, and draws the reader in, I found the flow and rthym fantastic, Still it was sad and I hope it was not based on real pain, blessings John

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It is kind of based on my life. Tho not totally. I am glad that you liked it. Thanks for reading it and commenting it.
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Wow! You have really poured your feelings into this piece. The imagery is very hard hitting and you have expressed how you feel quite matter of factly.
But this is a write that so many people will understand and relate to....sadly.
Well done indeed and thank you fro shring
All the best
Gaylene


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thanks for the comment. Yeah it is very emotional. I am glad that you liked it.
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Thanks as I read and re-read this poem I still want to tear up. It's a painful poem for me to read. I am glad that you liked it tho. Maybe someone will understand the side of the victim after reading my poem. I hope so.
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