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Trespass

I see you now as I should’ve then:
An oasis, solitary in this sub-urban Sahara
nourished by the Breath of God, where
Angels grow and flowers sing

(You see? Even here I twist my words
for you, becoming incomprehensible
in my telling you how)

here I am at last, here to tend to
the flowers of your smile.
Here I am at last, here to rest easy in the peace
of the Breath of God and
your voice.

Here I am at last, here to welcome that
oft-envied Blue-Jay,

She who perches so precariously on the
rain-dampened willows of your eyes

She, who dares
trespass into the barbed-wire boundaries
of my heart, who dares to sing her
ethereal song

Only to find that she’s been home,
all along.

Author notes

This is actually a very personal poem to me; it's the first work I wrote for my girlfriend, the love of my life

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 17 of 17

  • ubercrazygirl gold member
    October 27

    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful and peaceful, and I loved the flow and bit of humor at the beginning. Whoever was the receiver of this piece is one lucky person. I would be awed and woo'd beyond imagination to have such a gift given to me. Thank you for entering.

  • This was a amazing piece that you have here. Very good. I enjoyed reading this one. Thanks for entering and best of luck too you in the contest.

  • strong and powerful wording, thanks for entering and best of luck to u


  • Denerica
    April 7
    Edit | Reply
    Nothing like God's breath to breathe life into everything. Refreshing write. Blessings.

  • Well, I will admit you painted this poem in my head.
    Which is ultimately commendable.
    Thank you for entering this into my contest.


  • Celticpoet silver member
    April 3
    Edit | Reply

    A lovely write!

    A lovely write....yet has nothing to do with the contest topic!

  • Wow wow wow WOW. Every line brought another epiphany. What great words! I can't even explain! And anyone can relate. A very emotionally triggering poem. Thank you for sharing and good luck.


  • lostsouls12
    March 9
    Edit | Reply
    this is very beautiful.

  • poets whisper silver member
    February 15
    Edit | Reply
    This starts out almost like one of the Geico commercials ... thank you for the entry


  • Lady Michaella
    February 14

    Edit | Reply
    this poem is so beautiful. very well written and so heartfealt. i felt all that emotion in me.. its beautiful and an amazing poem! great work with this one!

    thanks for entering! and best of luck in the contest!!

    Your Co-Judge,
    -Lemon Bee-
    xx


  • Auburn Sunrise gold member
    February 12

    Edit | Reply
    This is so sweet and heart-felt.

    I love the images of the past mingled with the security of the present and future.

    Thank you for enering!


  • alexandra.
    February 5

    Edit | Reply
    I like this.

    "Even here I twist my words
    for you, becoming incomprehensible
    in my telling you how"

    'barbed-wire boundaries'

    you have some really nice imagery.


  • Shadow Stalker
    February 2
    Edit | Reply

    Very Nice

    You did a fantastic job with imagery. Nice write and good luck in the contest. Thanks for entering.


  • Lorenzo
    January 29
    Edit | Reply
    I love you so much! Baby, I love you so so so much!


  • wingsofgold25 silver member
    January 28
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for this beautiful write .
    Good luck in the contest


  • angelli803
    January 25

    Edit | Reply
    how sweet and beautiful, yet i can still sense a wanting of more... you definitely painted me a deep and lovely picture...
    good luck!


  • Silverstar1993
    September 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This makes me sad, because it's such a very pretty (excuse the metaphor) stained glass window that reality will shatter.
    Thank you for enter, and good luck. Also, please put your author name in the notes.

1 - 17 of 17