I should have sense enough to know I'm not making any sense
I guess I'm just overcompensating for lack of said sense
Explaining myself in circles inside circles
Until even I don't know what I'm trying to say
I love you.
No, I only like you.
I actually just think you're cute.
No, I love you.
You laugh at my stumbling, fumbling, crumbling
My resolve has sunk to my toes
Or is there a part of me lower?
How on earth did we last this long?
I hate you.
No, I only dislike you.
I actually just think you're annoying.
No, I hate you.
You aren't making any effort to look like you're trying
I'm not making any effort to look like I'm not crying
And yet, you comfort me like you did before
Arms around me, heart around me
It's sink or swim, baby
And we're floundering
Like the noun.
Like the verb.
I guess I'm just overcompensating for lack of said sense
Explaining myself in circles inside circles
Until even I don't know what I'm trying to say
I love you.
No, I only like you.
I actually just think you're cute.
No, I love you.
You laugh at my stumbling, fumbling, crumbling
My resolve has sunk to my toes
Or is there a part of me lower?
How on earth did we last this long?
I hate you.
No, I only dislike you.
I actually just think you're annoying.
No, I hate you.
You aren't making any effort to look like you're trying
I'm not making any effort to look like I'm not crying
And yet, you comfort me like you did before
Arms around me, heart around me
It's sink or swim, baby
And we're floundering
Like the noun.
Like the verb.
Author notes
I love the world "overcompensate" and I finally wrote a poem with the word in it! This poem was actually written around that one word. XD Plus- by "like the noun, like the verb," I mean flounder (n) a type of flatfish and (v) behave awkwardly. Most of this poem is floundering. But I love it.
In a list
A contest entry
- Best Poems Ever by Scion.
900 points, ended October 27, 2008, 29 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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i love this poem! it's so great! my favorite parts are when you are fighting with yourself saying "i love you, no i just like you" and "i hate you, no i just dislike you..." it was great!
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First glance, I thought this was adorable. Your first two stanzas show (and I mean show, not tell) how awkward love can be, how ambigious, how silly, how unbelievably confusing. Wonderful. Your transition into stanzas 3 & 4 is flawless, and obviously shows how love is messy, how it hurts, how it changes like day and night. Other than that I love the entirety, though the title could have been a bit more flashy (it's the only thing that did TELL). The author notes are that touch that I wanted to see from this contest. Hm, if your prompt poem is this wonderful, you're in a great shape. Cheers, Scion
My score:
Rules-9
Title-8.3
Theme-8.7
Structure-9
uniqueness-8.6
Grammar-8.8
Total Average- 52.6 -
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Thanks so much for the kind words- you have no idea how happy they made me
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You're Welcome.

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This is different but I like it, and thank you for reading and replying to my poem good luck in the contest as well.


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No, thank you! Good luck to you too =]
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Me too, lol.you have a unique style, don't ever let anyone change it,...BUT, if you would thus and so, lol hehehe,
love, Bell


1 - 7 of 7





