these glass walls reverberate
with the screams of my passion
this bell jar can’t hold me
and I could sing till my hearts was content
did you ever hear it?
the words as I spoke them and the truth as it jingled
[you ignored it]
left it on the floor...
on display
what more do I have to live for than this ?
stage on which you have set me
this ultimate punishment
its the only thing I know
[pretend]
I know better
but I opened the lid
I guess I wanted the attention
my mind was the wet sand
with each step I took a new impression
I’m waiting for you to walk on the beach
Author notes
i tried to wrote this as if it was form your point of view
i hope that i did it right and that you like it
alix
i know its tough being a kid
trust me im there to
its that time of your life
where you want to be right
but it cant always be that way
i tried to put a little of you and me in this
and i hope that you like it
please tell me what you think!
A contest entry
- SPECIAL INVITE PLEASE...Outside the Box...Pic Prompt by nevadapoet.
1000 points, ended September 15, 2008, 19 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
-
:]
so awesome!!
-
Well written, lil one. It is tough being a kid, but most kids don't realize, it's also tough being an adult.
*hugs*
Slayer
-
this bell jar can’t hold me
my mind was the wet sand
with each step I took a new impression
i think it should have just ended at that
<3 -
Thank you for accepting our invitation. I do like your poem and can relate to your thoughts. It is tough being a kid.
Alix...daughter of Nevadapoet
-
I think my favorite part is:
"these glass walls reverberate
with the screams of my passion
this bell jar can’t hold me
and I could sing till my hearts was content
did you ever hear it?"
I adore that.
I love it actually.
Good luck in the contest cupcake ♥
-Rainbow. -
I like this poem, its kind of sad,
but it is very touching
-
-
thank you
-
-
n/p
-
-
-
lovely.
-
-
-
these glass walls reverberate
with the screams of my passion
---
i LOVE that part.
i loev the word reverberate hahaa
and then i like how after all that stuff about yelling you wrote 'did you hear it?'
that was honestly a really great line. really hit hard.
my mind was the wet sand
with each step I took a new impression on my mind
---
thats my other favourite line
but mind seems kinda repetitive maybe change it to thoughts? or another word. maybe?
xo♥ goodluck in the contesttt
Adding your comment:
1 - 11 of 11
