And it happened whenever she sang
the sadness in her soul lifted into air
like misted tears or love from a lonely place
maybe it was so even as children
when the church piano called us to blend
in harmony I would still hear a certain sound
above all the other sounds,
and it stayed, it was also within me
[ I think she knew me before my world took shape
and in leaving, a little of it… fell apart]
I will always hear the heavy and full
pull of the songs she sang, and the
memories will burn my eyes, like
a wind too harsh, or smoke too thick and sudden
when I write a poem I know she will never see
and know I will never hear the gifts of her heart,
a burden rises in my throat, and makes
a long moment, an unspoken lyric
a held note fading slow to caress my ear
my song of saudade.
In a list
A contest entry
- Saudade by Mari Goes.
1800 points, ended September 20, 2008, 6 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
-
The sights and sounds that bring back memories, and make us feel saudade even intenser. You show here how saudade can be felt, and one of the many things that cause it.
This is an excellent poem filled with emotions.
Thanks for this saudade
Mari
-
-
Thank you Mari
your kind words are appreciated, this idea Saudade I think it is something in all of us, that we can all understand in our lives...h
-
-
Yes it is, just many don't know the name of that feeling
-
-
Thank you for the honor of the green cup, congratulations to all of the winning entries, I think we are all better for adding a new word to our vocabulary, a new idea to how we see things...h
-
-
-
-
Your words leave an imprint
on the mind of the reader,
slow to leave, like the note
you describe...
M-C
-
For me, the best poems are those that don't insult the reader, by that I mean the poet understands the power of words and knows, like a chef knows a recipe, when an amount of an ingredient is enough. That inability is my greatest complaint with poetry on AP, and fortunately it is one of your strengths. Your poetry is intelligent, elegant yet it understands that too much dressing just detracts from the poem, I guess like most things in life.
I have stopped saying that "I am sorry" in my comments for I once got a reply from someone suggesting such sentiments were worthless. So to avoid such a repeat I'll say that it is implied in my comment.
This is my favorite in the contest. Though I haven't read them all yet...and since I am not a judge this is where you should say that such a sentiment is worthless.
-
-
Thank you...very kind...PK
-
-
What a tender memory, describing a closeness that only a sibling could know, perhaps the sound of her voice coming through as your own. I felt a rush of emotion with reading the words, and it seemed that my heart swelled, I longed for a sister that I have never had. {{{Peteskid}}}
-
oh.. and I loved the way you started it off with And... like whatever you have to say after that has no start, that it has always been there, solid and never changing.
-
This is beautiful. Dramatic, heartfelt.. and heart breaking. I liked especially the second to last stanza, that blew me away... "like a wind too harsh, or smoke too thick and sudden"....a wave of emotion, striking hard, deep and lingering in your heart.. a void, unfilled, untouched and forever present..
Your words have touched deep in my heart...
Criss
-
No words to express how much I loved this. sigh.
-
Exceptional write.Alot of emotion felt as I read this..The love for a sister, and the memories you have of her! Bravo...Magnificent!
Adding your comment:
1 - 12 of 12
