A baby born one summers night
Not aware that something wasn't right
Years go on and I hate being lame
And behind closed doors called abusive names
Jilted by many that should have helped and cared
Overcame hatred and kids ignorant stares
Encouraged to break chains of being disabled
Learning to love others and never to label
Living with fear and very low self esteem
Insecurities try to ruin my dreams
Every day new beginnings to try once again
No longer a prisoner of what happened back then
Now I am free to forgive, to love and venture on
Embracing the future and a bright, new horizon
Author notes
Topic suggested by Bornwithapen
A contest entry
- How good are you at acrostics? by Titus.
450 points, ended May 22, 8 entries
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Comments
1 - 52 of 52
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Very well written poem. I can personally understand the overall set of feelings in this poem.
Well Done! -
amazing acrostic.
thanks for entering..
a very deep piece.
good luck. -
Love the accrostic using your screen name. I'm not sure why people think it makes them feel good or think they are better when putting others down. I never understood it myself. Growing up I never thought to make fun of others for I wouldn't want it done to me (and I use to be called names for a part of my body, but then turned it around for my advantage). I know it may be hard for you to believe, but I still have low self-esteem (no matter how popular I may appear on here). I want to thank you for your entry into the following contest: "To Be Put On My Favorites List."
Ted E
PS: Your entry has been blessed by the three wise clappers, but don't spend the whole nine points in one place(lol)!
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nicely written and really I think of it as an inspiration to those of us who grew up an are growing up thinking that they are different. Excellent write. Thanks for sharing this with us and thanks for entering it into my contest.
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I liked the rhyme, but the last line was a little forced. It's good that you are able to overcome this obstacle, and I'm sorry for your hardship.
Rose -
This was a very deep write. I really like it and wonder is it for real is this a real person or just a topic to be written about. Thank you for sharing.
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this is quite a good acrostic... you know its good when youre not sure its an acrostic til after reading it. it flows well with lots of emotion and i like how its uplifting without being sickeningly sweet or over the top happy. very nice thanks
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If only there were a diagramed picture of what we could possibly become before chance and circumstance would have us molded into the world around us, leaving us to have to chip away pieces we do not wish, and replace them with new clay, while we still struggle to keep the good parts whole from crumbling away.
A great write, and it is awesome how you used your name to make this an arcostic piece as well.
-cheers
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clappys
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This sounds like you know this person well, if not you are that person, so personal, but very sad to say, I thought I was reading my own. Lovely piece.
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Great use of rhyme and the flow is great, too.
I can imagine people that are in this situation finding this an inspiration, helping them to come out of themselves and help themselves to imrprove their situation.
Nice write.
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you are very adept at expressing and revealing yourself in verse. this is also wonderful!!!
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very well worded, bravo
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Exquisitely mastered
A true story of triumph and victory .
Excellent read,
Cher
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good
i like the theme here of overcoming obstacles. Flows nicely and imagery was pretty good. all in all I enjoyed reading this. the ending is really good.
-peace
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Sometimes these disabilities come later in life. I'm not sure if they are any easier to handle or harder to deal with compared to someone born with a burden to carry. You capture the essence of what happens in these few short lines! Very insightful!
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The sadness etched in the beginning of the piece is over shadow by the emerging strength at the end. Makes me take a harder look at myself. Tis an inspiring piece you have penned here.
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U ROK!!!
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i can very much relate i like it
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So sad, yet so hopeful.
A true inspirational poem.
I love how you end with "Embracing the future and a bright, new horizon" It shows true courage.
Keep going hun, strength is the key.
xXx
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Thought provoking write. Its great to see a positive hope come through despite the ignorance of others. Well done
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that sounds like my daughters baby
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This is VERY Good
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Kids can be so cruel, the hard part is how much it stems over and effects people into adulthood...You have become the better person, by letting go of the anger and hostility...nicely written piece of personal words...
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If Only
Sis if only I was half the person you are. You have a wonderful heart. You have been through so much and yet your so positive.
That Rocks
Love
LDG
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Wow. U have got almost every emostion flowing with every word great job
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good
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The most emphatic line i think is "Learning to love others and never to label" speaks volumes and lightens the general dark tone. nice poem
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Lovely poem hun shows great sadness and pain
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very good
people should be aware of the energy and power they put out around them. It makes the impossible, possible. So never say never unless u are around impossible people.
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Rare Beauty!
Beautiful flow..most delightful hopeful write I have encountered..Registers with all those overcoming personal difficulties, of whatever nature..Disabilities of any sort..
The rhyming pattern is excellent...So much hope that rises above circumstances penned here! A masterpiece of a write!
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beautiful
This made me cry...i loved the mixed emotions of both despair but strngth to keep going. such eloquent words and beautiful pace. I love your style!
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Truth is spoken
Life can be a hard lot. I see you have experienced this with the image you've painted. Sorrow speaks to me here, and wracks the soul. Good expression!
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Wonderful work here and thanks a lot for
sharing it with us all! I love your flow and
rhyme scheme.
Jeremy0826 -
This is beautiful, touching, and a wonderful write! This is something that is terribly hard to overcome, Great Job!
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A very nice write. It flows very evenly, and although "on" and "horizon" don't exactly rhyme, it works. I struggle to rhyme and it seems you did it pretty effortlessly. Good job!
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this was wonderful, amazing rhyme as well. Love how you contrasted the dark, and hate with the forgivness, love, and compassion. Very nicely done ♥Rhi
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so sweet and from the heart!! This piece in incredible!! I love it!!
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A wonderful written poem from the heart
love & light
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The varying lengths of the lines didn'y bother me, I liked it, well done, keep up the good work!
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ah
it rhymes--fantastic. here's a couple of thoughts.
try to make your lines the same length--it'll change the whole rhythm for the better. "very" is a sad little word--it doesn't mean anything. "very low self esteem" doesn't ring the same as "low self esteem".
"on" and "horizon" don't rhyme. The rest of the piece does and for the final couplet to fall apart--rough. A good start for a good piece.
write on.
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Beautifully done. People can be horrible and I am sorry you went through that. I was intrigued by the title and so I read and I am glad I did. You have a great way with words. best of luck to you in all things.
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like the expression . . truth in this one . . well done !!
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WOW THIS IS REALLY GOOD!!!!
This was very touching.
The way it was wrote brought out the emotion.
I can actually feel what you are saying.
Years go on and I hate being lame
And behind closed doors called abusive names
Those are my favorite lines.
Don't know why, but I guess I can relate to that.
I LOVE THIS POEM.
GREAT WRITE.
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Sad
Its sad how people treat others when they are disabled. To forgive those awful people who treated you like a nobody is a big challenge for you. Letting go of the bad memories and moving on with a better focus of life is awesome. I hope you find all your dreams to come true.
Mahalo
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The first thing that stands out for me is the natural rhyme. Combined with a rhythm in which we can lose ourselves, this poem is a very satisfying read. The message is clear, and the word choice creates a very smooth passage from the darkness into the 'bright, new horizion'.
'Learning to love others and never to label' is the crux of the piece, and it becomes motivational not just for yourself, but for those whom it teaches to feel a connection with the world after long years of hiding from it.
But again...the structure, rhyme, rhythm, wording...very impressive.
Mordegast
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Now that is a Great. Poem .. I do Respect..
Your friend in Poetry... JackReed3...
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Its a very positive piece. Im not all for rhyming so consistently, or in such exact form I guess.
It is a very good write, it does rhyme, but it flows in a way that tells a story, and hooks the reader.
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your writting is getting better, keep up the good work!
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Hi Anya
This is a heart filled write - It is great to learn my dear that you have moved on the way God would want you to - you hit the nail right on the head with the last two lines - forgiving - loving and venturing on, as difficult ae it may be - I hope and pray that you will continue on knowing/believing for a brighter future Anya - now a little critique = Line 2 needs revamping - it suggests that the baby knew or didn't know something and it appears to me that it is a double negative - keep on penning my dear one - when you're up write a poem - when you're down write a poem - Bless God and God will bless you - Joe ------------------------------------ hugs
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Hmm another nice one really! Born gives you good topics really and you write good stuff on them! Wonderful and the rhyme is nice too! A bit sad isn't it? I was a bit confused about who the baby is!
"Years go on and I hate being lame
And behind closed doors called abusive names
Jilted by many that should have helped and cared
Overcame hatred and kids ignorant stares"
Liked the part shows the cruelty of the thing, those who would have helped and cared!, I just liked it shows how harsh can life be sometimes! Well as a whole a great piece really1 And again have my Good Lucks!
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Tres bon! Encore!
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