Witness a foal
and a mare
ghosting memories.
Papa used to reminisce -
winds
full of gentle touches
and sudden storms;
a cowboy knows:
"There are times
to polish a saddle
and just put it away."
I’ve let you say you’re sorry -
laid down with submission
hoping love to heal the wounds.
It's the wild ones
that become saddle sore,
mountains beyond prairies
are the only true corrals.
I stood watching clouds gather,
sheltering shame;
ducking too many times -
Mavericks can’t be broken.
Author notes
prompt: A horse
A contest entry
- Collage by Cat.
3500 points, ended October 4, 2008, 22 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Make this THE largest Contest EVER on AP [enter, enter, enter!] by Symphony.
18000 points, ended April 28, 1011 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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This brought so much imagery to my mind; I remember reading one of yours before, in a different, more painful contest - and that I loved your style of writing
So that makes it even better for me to see something like this; so different, and more uplifting in a way, that you can cross different lines to produce various forms of work.
For me, it brougth to mind a cowboy, with his hat hanging on a loop down his back, and his thumbs stuck in his belt buckles, feet spread, and tired eyes gazing out over the land - but not really [i]seeing[/i] the land, rather, he is lost in his memories, gazing back over the years.
You worded this wonderfully, my favourite part was most definitely,;
"It's the wild ones
that become saddle sore,
mountains beyond prairies
are the only true corrals. "
It brought back the ancient saying, "if you love something, set it free - if it comes back, it is yours, if not, it was never meant to be" - so profound, and so true, and your "mountains are the only true corrals" - fantastic idea of phrasing there! Truly, loved this, thank you for entering it
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Thank you for such kind words your vision is very clear 'cep you might want to switch cowboy for cowgirl as I often write as a female.
otherwise good eye 
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An image formed in my mind, of a man leaning against an old stable door..looking in on the past, reminiscing, his father's voice surfacing from his memories..bringing an array of mixed emotions.. including pain, then turning from the door, looking out on the present, silently (now from an adult perspective) acknowledging how his strength of spirit had both served, and saved him.
Needless to say I LOVE this poem!!!!!!
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i really think you did a great job here- it has some really nice line values and
strong alliterative qualities.
i have to admit that i see the word maverick and my first thought is equal to al's.
i think i would wrangle some of those gerunds for an even stronger write.. but this is REALLY very good ..
thanks so much
m
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well i think we may see one maverick broken in the next few weeks...lol
really nice use of the prompt, thanks for the entry here...
al -
interesting to me that the first stanza could stand on its own merit as a ditty.
nice one
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"I’ve let you say you’re sorry -
laid down with submission
hoping love to heal the wounds."...
those three lines bare the entirety to emotion.
I love that in a write, but it must be done without
pity (self or otherwise). And there is no pity found here, only a sharing, maybe tinged with regret that
bends into a tone of mellowed acceptance. The metaphor used also focuses moment of reflection. Excellent Ken!
Blue
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As always your comments are on the mark and most appreciated
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Ghosts, memories, fences, and unbroken mavericks: I wish I could paint the way you do, for your thought is so open to the glory and freedom of unchained spirit. To know when to let something lie is wisdom, and I think probably, also, great love.
I've never ridden horses, just watched them from afar, swift and powerful...and fragile.
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Poems which seem simple
are the best. I sometimes think that if a poem cannot be read easily by a 12 year-old then it fails. [However, we would need to banish a hell of a lot of great poems, then.
]
I know that Robert Frost can be 'done' from elementary level to doctoral theses.
The more I read this the more I see. Tomorrow will be the same. That has to say something!
This is a poem about individuality in life and, like a true poet, your extended metaphor of horses informs the whole poem. There is a sweet sadness that insists life is like this and it is.
It may be just me, but I place this poem up there with professional poetry. Ron.
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This made me sad. I've had to 'polish my saddle and put it away'.
Great poem.
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What stands out to me .. is that you mention forgiveness
and then that last line - well, maybe I misread, but it almost takes it away for me..
it is forgiveness, but it feels conditional somehow..if that makes sense
love the use of the prompt, too
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There are so many wonderful nuances in this poem. I loved the folksy wisdom of ""There are times
to polish the saddle
and just put it away."
and the last line was descriptive on so many levels. The title was perfect. Good luck in this contest. Peace, Liz
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