Not many years I can remember
Without not wanting to die
Without wanting not to want to cut
Not wanting to heal myself once again
Not many years ago
I can still remain that significant pain
To want to die
To want to go away
Not many years she was still here
It felt like yesterday
We were outside
I was helping her plant her garden
But that was back then
Not many years ago
She was still in pain
Still depressed
Couldn't move out that bed
Wanting to move on
To feel something better
Than this hell she was living in
Not many years ago
I was still depressed(still am)
Still willing to sin
Still see myself in that aweful stage
Saying it's only me right now
Who's the only one feeling this way
Not many years ago
I saw myself in that hospital room
In that bathroom
While she was a sleep
Cutting myself
Wishing I wouldn't sink this low
Cutting myself right next to her
Without her even knowing
I think she knew
She never wanted to believe it
She knew me
She knew I was sad to see her that way
She never wanted me to
To take care of her this way
Neither she wanted my sister either
Not many years ago
I was dark
All I wrote was sad poems
That really didn't change
But I grew to accept that
Not many years ago
I was a different person
Who wants to be strong for her
To show her how much I want to thank her
To thank her for what she had left to give me
I've overcome some obstacles since then
But you could say I've changed alot since then
Say that I grew out of that depressing stage
But I know deep down it'll never go away
I'll never regret what I've done
What could I have changed
But now it makes sense
It made me the person who I am today
A contest entry
- inspire me........how far have you come? by doesne1care.
465 points, ended October 24, 2008, 28 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything but gold... by SchizoChic.
450 points, ended October 3, 2008, 61 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - All you can be? by Erozay.
550 points, ended February 3, 46 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - New!Another contest by me!!Trust me you won't be disappointed! by star girl.
600 points, ended April 8, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give me something real- let me feel it! by lillypilly.
3100 points, ended May 3, 29 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Desolate of Heart by Hannah Carr.
900 points, ended June 10, 35 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
-
It's good. Thanks for entering
-
Powerful
This was a great poem,and I really liked how you just made these words into this powerful write!Its amazing and your a very good poet.I'm sorry that you went through this, really. I enjoyed reading this, it had a nice flow, and it was catchy.
Awesome! thank you for entering
Good luck!
-
its good
-
-
Wow! You've come a long way poet. I know how it is to lose a parent and feel that way. Best of luck to you
-
gosh, very powerful poem, very deep and i can empathise with you.
very powerfull poem all through, and very strong ending, and yes all the tough times we go through it does seem to make us who we are and a better person at the end off it all.
thankyou for sharing it with me, and good luck in th contest x
Adding your comment:
1 - 6 of 6
