Fractured mind and soul;
Tortures that went before.
They are my bonding means;
Weaving my pieces together –
Like sutures over open wounds
Keeping me from the hole of darkness.
Soft whispers in my cruel ear;
Bewildering chatting away -
Disturbing my waking thoughts,
Like nightmares in the daytime.
But they are mine to keep –
Family of one made up of many.
In a list
A contest entry
- - Beautiful Minds, Dark Addictions VI - by Arkbear.
400 points, ended September 11, 2008, 9 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - (First Contest!) The internal struggle of self by insideinsanity.
1250 points, ended January 4, 22 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Insanity by Dmonik.
3000 points, ended May 4, 31 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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congrats on all those trophies...they are well deserved..this poem is just as complex as your title suggest..that last line summed up quite a bit i think...the stanzas are quite deep and dark..but i think there is more behind them...nicely written
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This is a very interesting piece.
Weaving my pieces together –
Like sutures over open wounds
Keeping me from the hole of darkness.
I really like those lines. Thanks for entering my contest. -
Excellent
a very dark and probing piece. Wonderful images. So very well crafted. Congratulations on the trophies. they were well deserved.
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Hmm. What an interesting piece. The physical description - sutures over wounds - to keep the darkness out... Spectacular. It's interesting to see the idea that the outside is what's tearing the inside apart.
The second stanza begins to seem like it's something less than a physical unsurity of the environment but more of a fear of some*one* in the environment, even if it's only just dream figments.
What a great piece!
Thank you for entering.
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i like. our minds are like mosaics, made of tiles of all or loves and fears, and if we mix up the tiles we get confused.
nice write and good luck
Kitch x -
Now THIS is what I was looking for....nothing here to critique....best read so far......splendid take on the Prompt.....each line has thought & power.....thank you for entering...God bless you,
Bear ~
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I'm humbled by you kind comment. Thank you so much.
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"Soft whispers in my cruel ear" ooh... feels like a transferred epithet, and when that works it WORKS! Very atmospheric little poem.
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